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Expectations for the Head Coach at Nebraska


EZ-E

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- win 70% to 75% of games

 

- no scandals, personal or instituional

 

- have a good working relationship with the media. you will have a love/hate realtionship

with them, but as nebraskans we are an understanding people and just want info. on the

team. you will probably be paid north of 3 million, deal with it.

 

- teach and develop a fundementally system of football that college kids can learn and

put into action on 20 hours a week.

 

- recruit the athletes that fit that system and develop depth on the team.

 

- promote the nebraska way- mentally tough and physical style of football. everybody

plays hard for 60 minutes, if not they sit.

 

- keep and uphold the traditions- academic all-americans, blackshirts to 11, the walkon program, etc.

 

- your are a represenative of the university and state, the most recognizable person in the state, you

will be held to a higher standard, again 3 million reasons to deal with it. i have been fortunate

eonugh to live in this great state for almost 50 years, i have no idea what any of the govenors look like.

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Farmer. Chews on straw and hotwires tractors. Doesn't rely on pu&&y weatherman forecasts, since he can sniff the air and tell you about next week's storm. Drinks at least six beers a night. And not the trendy microbrew sh#t, but Natty Light like a real man.

 

Maybe Herbie can take it in the interim. He's been groomed for many decades. And not that inflatable douche either. The real Herbs. Wears overalls, knows what Windsor is, has a gin blossom and a ruddy and porous completion, has an ice scrapper under his front seat. You know, like a real Nebraskan.

That's Canadian whiskey and a blend at that, a real Nebraskan drinks American straight Bourbon whiskey! T_O_B

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He needs to love Nebraska more than his wife (preferably born and raised in Nebraska, perhaps conceived in either the capital building or near chimney rock), be a tough coach who inspires Heisman-worthy performances with a mere glare, and simultaneously a softhearted Christian man who cries during the national anthem. He must never blame himself as a cop-out after losses but must somehow also take full responsibility for every loss. Actually, that last sentence is irrelevant because he must never lose games without proving himself un-worthy to be the coach at Nebraska.

 

He must be passionate and excited all the time, but never say anything that would offend anyone. He must make every single high school football player want to play at Nebraska, even if they're the son of the dean of the University of Alabama. He must work his players into top performing shape while giving them puppies and ice cream to boost their morale.

 

Also he should be attractive and a Republican and have a name that is easy to pronounce and can be made into an inspiring slogan.

 

I enjoyed this one.

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Do what Urban Meyer has done at tOSU? I don't know. It's hard to put expectations I guess most people will say no blow out losses, no more than 4 losses per year, beat top 15, top 10 opponents.

 

At this point I think most of us would settle for not getting embarrassed by top 10/15 opponents.

 

My list:

Compete for division title nearly every year. If we lose a close game or two that knocks us out, that's fine, it happens.

Win a conference title 3-4 times every 10 years.

Finish virtually every season in the top 25. More times than not we should be in the top 15-20. Occasionally top 10.

At least be in the discussion as part of the four team playoff once or twice every 10 years.

 

Maybe I've set my bar too low because of the mediocrity that I've come to expect.

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