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Here's the Rules


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Iowa State is allowing 25,000 season ticket holders into the first game against Louisiana 

 

Everyone going to the game has to wear a face covering from the minute they leave their vehicle to the minute they get back in their vehicle to leave

 

No tailgating will be allowed

 

No ruling on how many people will be allowed at the rest room trough at one time...

 

Violators will be shot.

 

Looks like we'll be getting some games in

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Cy the Cyclone said, “Here's the Rules.”

 

He didn’t name them all. There will also be other new rules in effect for game play as well...

 

All linemen must be six feet apart while set on the line of scrimmage.

 

The game ball will be sanitized after every play with lots of gooey cleaning solution.

 

The quarterback must not yell out signals as this might spread something nasty from his mouth. He must WHISPER the signals with restraint while being muffled and oxygen-deprived behind a thick face mask.

 

In a two-back set, they must be HOW many feet apart when they get set?... You know the answer, all together now...!

 

Covid testing will be done on all players and coaches and field personnel at halftime. Test results will be completed four weeks from now. The results will be announced next month. Any positive tests will be ignored and the results suppressed.

 

QBs must not stand next to coaches that are in vulnerable age groups. While setting up game strategy, QB and Coach must use hand signals and semaphore to communicate. The other team must promised they won’t look.

 

Of course, huddling after every play is OUT. Players must stand with their backs to each other in a wide circle while drones deliver plays in from coaches up in the booth.

 

After touchdowns, there will be no celebrating allowed. Players will be permitted to bring towels out from under their jerseys to wave with slogans like, “Oh Boy!.. Whoopee!...  and of course, “Take that, Suckahs...”

 

If a game is tied after four quarters, there will be no overtime so that further exposure and possible contamination is reduced. Games will be decided by which school brought the hottest cheerleaders to the sidelines. Judges will be the game announcers for the network doing the television feed.

 

And most of all, after you’ve memorized and followed all of the 1,750 rules and regulations now governing current college football games in the Covid age... be sure to HAVE FUN and ENJOY THE GAME.
 

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