Pressure from parents to make grandkids

Mierin

Mierin

Assistant Coach
What are some of the annoying/funny comments you non-parents get from your grandchild-wanting-parents?

My mom doesn't pressure me too much (probably 'cause one of my 2 siblings pulled through for her and created 2 of them) but she drops what she thinks are casual hints.

For instance I'm in the middle of moving and was talking about selling my cheap dresser. And she said, "Don't get rid of that. You might need it for baby clothes someday."

Keep in mind... we have never hinted that we're going to make babies for her.

 
I've never understood the concept of having children for the grandparent's sake or why some grandparents seem so hell bent on the idea. I really hope people aren't getting guilted into having kids over the relatively little time grandparents will actually spend with them. I too would like my kids to have kids some day but I'm sure as hell not going to pressure them into doing it before they are ready or at all. When it comes to having children, There are many more important things to consider than what a grandparent might prefer.

 
Moiraine:

Here is my experience. .

My parents have never pressured me to get married of have children. I'm now 40 years old (41 this Sept). If I wanted to have children I would have had them by now. For whatever reason relationships, finances really kept me from having kids as a practical possibility. Ive been dating my current girlfriend for a little over two years. We both had been through prior life experiences up to the point we start dating. I told her when we started dating if she was looking to have children then I'm not the guy for you and we can stay friends.

Back to my parents I think they realize the financial burden from their own experiences raising me and my two sisters. I think that is why they took a hands off approach.

 
OH HSKR FAN said:
Moiraine:

Here is my experience. .

My parents have never pressured me to get married of have children. I'm now 40 years old (41 this Sept). If I wanted to have children I would have had them by now. For whatever reason relationships, finances really kept me from having kids as a practical possibility. Ive been dating my current girlfriend for a little over two years. We both had been through prior life experiences up to the point we start dating. I told her when we started dating if she was looking to have children then I'm not the guy for you and we can stay friends.

Back to my parents I think they realize the financial burden from their own experiences raising me and my two sisters. I think that is why they took a hands off approach.
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This.

And honestly once I hit anout 45 we all admitted that kids screaming in restaurants, splashing around in pools, whining and etc was just not something any of us missed.

Im sure they would have loved them, and I know for many years they would have been stoked to have them. But now that we are over the hump theyre cool. (And none of my sibs delivered either.)

 
I never understood a parent's fascination with grandchildren. If they want more children, tell them to have more of their own; see how receptive they are to that.
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A person should never have a child simply because they are being pressured by their parents. Whenever my mother asks about grandchildren, I always bring up the fact that people are living longer now than they ever were before...and she still has time to have more of her own. She doesn't find that funny.
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In the end...the biggest reason probably is that is gives them and excuse to see you. Not saying you don't see your family a lot but for a lot of people, without kids, they tend to see mom/dad less and less to some extent. If they have grandkids there is that built in "reason" to see them or for them to visit you.

Also, people LOVE giving advice and being involved in other peoples lives (just look on this site with the crazy advice people give) and parents can't wait to tell you "how to do it" and stuff. Not in an evil way...just in a typical "I did this before, I can tell you what to do" way.

 
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