Southern Justice

husker rob

All-American
A big city lawyer went duck hunting in rural Hancock County.

He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer's field on the

other side of the fence.

As the lawyer climbed over the fence, an elderly farmer drove up on his

tractor and asked him what he was doing.

The litigator responded, "I shot a duck and it fell in this field, and

now I'm going to retrieve it."

The old farmer replied, "This is my property, and you are not coming over

here."

The indignant lawyer said, "I am one of the best trial attorneys in the

New England, and if you don't let me get that duck, I'll sue you, and

take everything you own."

The old farmer smiled and said, "Apparently, you don't know how we settle

disputes here. We settle small disagreements like this; with the "Three

Kick Rule".

The lawyer asked, "What is the Three Kick Rule?"

The Farmer replied, "Well, because the dispute occurred on my land, first

I kick you three times, and then you kick me three times, and so on back

and forth until someone gives up"

The attorney quickly thought about the proposed contest and decided that

he could easily take the old codger. So he agreed to abide by the local

custom.

The old farmer slowly climbed down from the tractor and walked up to the

attorney. His first kick planted the toe of his heavy steel toed work

boot into the lawyer's groin, which dropped him to his knees. His second

kick to the midriff sent the lawyer's last meal gushing from his mouth.

The lawyer was on all fours when the farmer's third kick, to his rear

end, sent him face-first into a fresh cow pie.

The lawyer summoned every bit of his will, and managed to get to his

feet.. Wiping his face with the arm of his jacket, he said, "Okay, you

old fart. No w it's my turn."

[i love this part....]

The old farmer smiled and said, "Naw, I give up. You can have the duck."

:nutz :nutz :nutz

 
Guys, before laughing, bear in mind that the Three Kick Rule also applies to every married guy...
you are right there. during my divorce i got to apply the 3 kick rule to my ex-wifes lawyer, and after i was done i said "I give up, you can have the b!^@h" :corndance :corndance :corndance :nutz :nutz :nutz

 
Love it! :thumbs
Great joke! Question: Do you know what you call a lawyer with an IQ of 85? Answer: Your honor.
watch out AR, is not only a Lawyer, he also has MODS power
I told that joke to a judge friend of mine and off the record he said that was more true than you would think!

That was his professional opinion. What can a mere layman like myself do but perpetuate this perception? Besides, I throw myself on the mercy of the court and plead nolo contendo for my insensitivity. Sorry AR.

 
Love it! :thumbs
Great joke! Question: Do you know what you call a lawyer with an IQ of 85? Answer: Your honor.
watch out AR, is not only a Lawyer, he also has MODS power
I told that joke to a judge friend of mine and off the record he said that was more true than you would think!

That was his professional opinion. What can a mere layman like myself do but perpetuate this perception? Besides, I throw myself on the mercy of the court and plead nolo contendo for my insensitivity. Sorry AR.
Not a problem at all. Oh, by the way - I need your mailing address. Makes it easier to serve you with the defemation complaint, you know...

 
Love it! :thumbs
Great joke! Question: Do you know what you call a lawyer with an IQ of 85? Answer: Your honor.
watch out AR, is not only a Lawyer, he also has MODS power
I told that joke to a judge friend of mine and off the record he said that was more true than you would think!

That was his professional opinion. What can a mere layman like myself do but perpetuate this perception? Besides, I throw myself on the mercy of the court and plead nolo contendo for my insensitivity. Sorry AR.
Not a problem at all. Oh, by the way - I need your mailing address. Makes it easier to serve you with the defemation complaint, you know...
Its 1600 Pennsylvania Ave.

 
Love it! :thumbs
Great joke! Question: Do you know what you call a lawyer with an IQ of 85? Answer: Your honor.
watch out AR, is not only a Lawyer, he also has MODS power
I told that joke to a judge friend of mine and off the record he said that was more true than you would think!

That was his professional opinion. What can a mere layman like myself do but perpetuate this perception? Besides, I throw myself on the mercy of the court and plead nolo contendo for my insensitivity. Sorry AR.
Not a problem at all. Oh, by the way - I need your mailing address. Makes it easier to serve you with the defemation complaint, you know...
Its 1600 Pennsylvania Ave.
Hmmmm...that means I'll have to add a "Gross Imcompetency" count, as well...

 
Last edited by a moderator:
Love it! :thumbs
Great joke! Question: Do you know what you call a lawyer with an IQ of 85? Answer: Your honor.
watch out AR, is not only a Lawyer, he also has MODS power
I told that joke to a judge friend of mine and off the record he said that was more true than you would think!

That was his professional opinion. What can a mere layman like myself do but perpetuate this perception? Besides, I throw myself on the mercy of the court and plead nolo contendo for my insensitivity. Sorry AR.
Not a problem at all. Oh, by the way - I need your mailing address. Makes it easier to serve you with the defemation complaint, you know...
Its 1600 Pennsylvania Ave.
Hmmmm...that means I'll have to add a "Gross Imcompetency" count, as well...
:)

 
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