Guys......I just couldn't resist this one!

ohiohusker

ohiohusker

Special Teams Player
Summer Classes for Men

at

THE ADULT LEARNING CENTER

REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED

by Friday, August 17 th 2008

NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL

OF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM

 

Class 1

How To Fill Up The Ice Cube Trays--Step by Step, with Slide Presentation.

Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.



Class 2

The Toilet Paper Roll--Does It Change Itself?

Round Table Discussion.

Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours.



Class 3

Is It Possible To Urinate Using The Technique Of Lifting The Seat and Avoiding The Floor, Walls and Nearby Bathtub?--

Group Practice.

Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours.

 

Class 4

Fundamental Differences Between The Laundry Hamper and The Floor--Pictures and Explanatory Graphics.

Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks.



Class 5

Dinner Dishes--Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Kitchen Sink?

Examples on Video.

Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning

at 7:00 PM

 

Class 6

Loss Of Identity--Losing The Remote To Your Significant Other.

Help Line Support and Support Groups.

Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM

 

Class 7

Learning How To Find Things--Starting With Looking In The Right Places And Not Turning The House Upside Down While Screaming.

Open Forum

Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.



Class 8

Health Watch--Bringing Her Flowers Is Not Harmful To Your Health.

Graphics and Audio Tapes.

Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.



Class 9

Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost--Real Life Testimonials.

Tuesdays at 6:00 PM Location to be determined

 

Class 10

Is It Genetically Impossible To Sit Quietly While She Parallel Parks?

Driving Simulations.

4 weeks, Saturday's noon, 2 hours.

 

Class 11

Learning to Live--Basic Differences Between Mother and Wife.

Online Classes and role-playing

Tuesdays at 7:00 PM, location to be determined

 

Class 12

How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion

Relaxation Exercises, Meditation and Breathing Techniques.

Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.

 

Class 13

How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy--Remembering Birthdays, Anniversaries and Other Important Dates and Calling When You're Going To Be Late.

Cerebral Shock Therapy Sessions and Full Lobotomies Offered.

Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.



Class 14

The Stove/Oven--What It Is and How It Is Used.

Live Demonstration.

Tuesdays at 6:00 PM, location to be determined.

Upon completion of any of the above courses, diplomas will be issued to the survivors.​


 
Dames...

Well, here you go, ladies.

Summer Classes for Women at The Learning Center for Adults

REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED BY Monday

NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL OF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 20 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM

1. Silence, the Final Frontier: Where No Woman Has Gone Before.

Meets 2 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM. In Bldg. B

2. The Undiscovered Side of Banking: Making Deposits

Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 3:00 for 2 hours.in Bldg. C

3. Parties: Going Without New Outfits

Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 AM for 2 hours. in Bldg. F

4. Man Management: Minor Household Chores Can Wait Till After Game

Meets Friday at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks. 2 hours. in Bldg. B

5. Bathroom Etiquette I: Men Need Space in the Bathroom Cabinet Too

Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM in Bldg A

6. Bathroom Etiquette II: His Razor is His

Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM in Bldg. E

7. Communication Skills I: Tears - The Last Resort, not the First.

Open Forum . Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours. in Bldg. G

8. Communication Skills II: Thinking Before Speaking

Open Forum Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours. in Bldg. G

9. Communication Skills III: Getting What you Want Without Nagging

Open Forum . Monday at 10:00 PM, 2 hours. in Bldg. G

10. Driving a Car Safely, Introduction to Parking & Advanced Parking: Backing Into a Space: A Skill You CAN Acquire

Graphics and Audio Tapes. Three mornings; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 AM for 4 hours. in Bldg.G

Fall & winter class line up are as follows:

. Telephone Skills: How to Hang Up

. Cooking I: Bringing Back Bacon, Eggs and Butter

. Cooking II: Bran and Tofu are Not for Human Consumption

. Cooking III: How not to Inflict Your Diets on Other People

. Compliments: Accepting Them Gracefully

. PMS: Your Problem... Not His

. Dancing: Why Men Don't Like To

. Classic Clothing: Wearing Outfits You Already Have

. Household Dust: A Harmless Natural Occurrence Only Women Notice

. Integrating Your Laundry: Washing It All Together

. Oil and Gas: Your Car Needs Both

. TV Remotes: For Men Only

 
Last edited by a moderator:
AR Husker Fan said:
Dames...

Well, here you go, ladies.

Summer Classes for Women at The Learning Center for Adults

REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED BY Monday

NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL OF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 20 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM

1. Silence, the Final Frontier: Where No Woman Has Gone Before.

Meets 2 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM. In Bldg. B

2. The Undiscovered Side of Banking: Making Deposits

Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 3:00 for 2 hours.in Bldg. C

3. Parties: Going Without New Outfits

Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 AM for 2 hours. in Bldg. F

4. Man Management: Minor Household Chores Can Wait Till After Game

Meets Friday at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks. 2 hours. in Bldg. B

5. Bathroom Etiquette I: Men Need Space in the Bathroom Cabinet Too

Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM in Bldg A

6. Bathroom Etiquette II: His Razor is His

Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM in Bldg. E

7. Communication Skills I: Tears - The Last Resort, not the First.

Open Forum . Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours. in Bldg. G

8. Communication Skills II: Thinking Before Speaking

Open Forum Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours. in Bldg. G

9. Communication Skills III: Getting What you Want Without Nagging

Open Forum . Monday at 10:00 PM, 2 hours. in Bldg. G

10. Driving a Car Safely, Introduction to Parking & Advanced Parking: Backing Into a Space: A Skill You CAN Acquire

Graphics and Audio Tapes. Three mornings; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 AM for 4 hours. in Bldg.G

Fall & winter class line up are as follows:

. Telephone Skills: How to Hang Up

. Cooking I: Bringing Back Bacon, Eggs and Butter

. Cooking II: Bran and Tofu are Not for Human Consumption

. Cooking III: How not to Inflict Your Diets on Other People

. Compliments: Accepting Them Gracefully

. PMS: Your Problem... Not His

. Dancing: Why Men Don't Like To

. Classic Clothing: Wearing Outfits You Already Have

. Household Dust: A Harmless Natural Occurrence Only Women Notice

. Integrating Your Laundry: Washing It All Together

. Oil and Gas: Your Car Needs Both

. TV Remotes: For Men Only
Click to expand...
I know some men that need to work on number 4 :P

 
I noticed a few classes missing from the ladies list.

1. Afterwards is not cuddle time.

2. Oral sex is pleasurable for him too.

3. Drinking with buddies is not the devil.

 
BIGREDIOWAN said:
I noticed a few classes missing from the ladies list.

1. Afterwards is not cuddle time.

2. Oral sex is pleasurable for him too.

3. Drinking with buddies is not the devil.
Click to expand...
Another:

Don't make us return to the days of "In the kitchen, Barefoot and pregnant."

 
Last edited by a moderator:
BIGREDIOWAN said:
I noticed a few classes missing from the ladies list.

1. Afterwards is not cuddle time.

2. Oral sex is pleasurable for him too.

3. Drinking with buddies is not the devil.
Click to expand...
4. Knowing Your Surroundings: How To Turn One's Head To See If The Toilet Seat Is Down

5. Communication Skills IV: Men Aren't Mind Readers

6. Communication Skills V : Learning Not To Ask Men Questions That You Don't Want Truthful Answers To

7. Cooking IV: The Smoke Detector Is Not a Timer

-----------------------------For Men---------------------------

1. The Real al Qaeda: Why Oprah, Dr. Phil, The Women On The View, WE, And The Lifetime Network Are Man's Enemy #1

 
sarge87 said:
BIGREDIOWAN said:
I noticed a few classes missing from the ladies list.

1. Afterwards is not cuddle time.

2. Oral sex is pleasurable for him too.

3. Drinking with buddies is not the devil.
Click to expand...
4. Knowing Your Surroundings: How To Turn One's Head To See If The Toilet Seat Is Down

5. Communication Skills IV: Men Aren't Mind Readers

6. Communication Skills V : Learning Not To Ask Men Questions That You Don't Want Truthful Answers To

7. Cooking IV: The Smoke Detector Is Not a Timer

-----------------------------For Men---------------------------

1. The Real al Qaeda: Why Oprah, Dr. Phil, The Women On The View, WE, And The Lifetime Network Are Man's Enemy #1
Click to expand...
:laughpound :laughpound :laughpound

 
BIGREDIOWAN said:
I noticed a few classes missing from the ladies list.

1. Afterwards is not cuddle time.

2. Oral sex is pleasurable for him too.

3. Drinking with buddies is not the devil.
Click to expand...
:yeah JACKPOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Here's another class too for the ladies

1. Sex should come more than twice a year and not just on anniversaries and birthdays

I'm not married yet but my buddies warn me about this one <_<

 
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