I WANNA PARTY WITH THIS GUY!!!!!!

[NUpolo8]

This is easily the best article I've read. Like, ever. I thought it was fair, justified, and most of all, prescient. Here's a snippet:

"I, like many, thought Nebraska would make a bigger splash in the B1G last year and possibly contend for a league title. That never materialized, but I think 2012 could be a big redemption year in Lincoln. This team is better than 9-4."

Fearless Predictions

Non-conference record: 4-0

Division Record: 4-1

Crossover Record: 2-

Overall: 10-2

Bowl: Rose

read the rest of the genius prose here.

http://network.yardbarker.com/all_sports/article_external/b1g_schedule_breakdown_nebraska/11528863

http://network.yardbarker.com/all_sports/article_external/b1g_schedule_breakdown_nebraska/11528863

 

[kchusker_chris]

...u don't read much do you.

 

[sd'sker]

so nice, you posted the link twice.

 

[NUance]

I, like many, thought Nebraska would make a bigger splash in the B1G last year and possibly contend for a league title.

Translation:

Restore the Order, 2011 edition, turned out like this:

 

[HuskerShark]

I hate that people seem to be worried about Iowa. Really? Iowa? Really? If Iowa ever beats us, I may just curl up on my bed and hide out until the bowl game. Actually, if we lose to Iowa, it probably means we won't be in a bowl game because we would have to suck that bad... which means that I would have to just quit my job and hide out until the following season.

SERIOUSLY! IT'S IOWA!!!

 

[Landlord]

I hate that people seem to be worried about Iowa. Really? Iowa? Really? If Iowa ever beats us, I may just curl up on my bed and hide out until the bowl game. Actually, if we lose to Iowa, it probably means we won't be in a bowl game because we would have to suck that bad... which means that I would have to just quit my job and hide out until the following season.

SERIOUSLY! IT'S IOWA!!!

You better start preparing for this pretty soon, because we aren't going to go 30-0 against Iowa until 2042 - they play everyone tough, never get blown out the way that we were against Wisconsin and Michigan.

 

[Always a husker]

I hate that people seem to be worried about Iowa. Really? Iowa? Really? If Iowa ever beats us, I may just curl up on my bed and hide out until the bowl game. Actually, if we lose to Iowa, it probably means we won't be in a bowl game because we would have to suck that bad... which means that I would have to just quit my job and hide out until the following season.

SERIOUSLY! IT'S IOWA!!!

I understand your thinking, but as any Nebraska fan should know wins are never guaranteed in college football. Heck, we almost got upset by big, bad FRESNO STATE! Iowa may come into the Nebraska game with a chip on their shoulder this year. Walking into a game thinking you have a for sure win is setting yourself up for failure.

 

[HuskerShark]

I hate that people seem to be worried about Iowa. Really? Iowa? Really? If Iowa ever beats us, I may just curl up on my bed and hide out until the bowl game. Actually, if we lose to Iowa, it probably means we won't be in a bowl game because we would have to suck that bad... which means that I would have to just quit my job and hide out until the following season.

SERIOUSLY! IT'S IOWA!!!

I understand your thinking, but as any Nebraska fan should know wins are never guaranteed in college football. Heck, we almost got upset by big, bad FRESNO STATE! Iowa may come into the Nebraska game with a chip on their shoulder this year. Walking into a game thinking you have a for sure win is setting yourself up for failure.

I agree with you, but that's not what mentality I'm taking. I'm taking the mentality that we are Nebraska, and they are Iowa, and we should pulverize them each and every time that we play them. No excuses.

 

[knapplc]

I hate that people seem to be worried about Iowa. Really? Iowa? Really? If Iowa ever beats us, I may just curl up on my bed and hide out until the bowl game. Actually, if we lose to Iowa, it probably means we won't be in a bowl game because we would have to suck that bad... which means that I would have to just quit my job and hide out until the following season.

SERIOUSLY! IT'S IOWA!!!

You better start preparing for this pretty soon, because we aren't going to go 30-0 against Iowa until 2042 - they play everyone tough, never get blown out the way that we were against Wisconsin and Michigan.

I got 100 cents that says we do. Put your money where your mouth is, Landlord.

 

[The Dude]

I hate that people seem to be worried about Iowa. Really? Iowa? Really? If Iowa ever beats us, I may just curl up on my bed and hide out until the bowl game. Actually, if we lose to Iowa, it probably means we won't be in a bowl game because we would have to suck that bad... which means that I would have to just quit my job and hide out until the following season.

SERIOUSLY! IT'S IOWA!!!

You better start preparing for this pretty soon, because we aren't going to go 30-0 against Iowa until 2042 - they play everyone tough, never get blown out the way that we were against Wisconsin and Michigan.

Sounds like something a closet Iowa fan would say.

 

[icedavis]

I hate that people seem to be worried about Iowa. Really? Iowa? Really? If Iowa ever beats us, I may just curl up on my bed and hide out until the bowl game. Actually, if we lose to Iowa, it probably means we won't be in a bowl game because we would have to suck that bad... which means that I would have to just quit my job and hide out until the following season. SERIOUSLY! IT'S IOWA!!!

You better start preparing for this pretty soon, because we aren't going to go 30-0 against Iowa until 2042 - they play everyone tough, never get blown out the way that we were against Wisconsin and Michigan.

The Hawkeye response:

 

[Apathy]

You better start preparing for this pretty soon, because we aren't going to go 30-0 against Iowa until 2042 - they play everyone tough, never get blown out the way that we were against Wisconsin and Michigan.

Sounds like something a closet Iowa fan would say.

 

[husker B-rent]

I hate that people seem to be worried about Iowa. Really? Iowa? Really? If Iowa ever beats us, I may just curl up on my bed and hide out until the bowl game. Actually, if we lose to Iowa, it probably means we won't be in a bowl game because we would have to suck that bad... which means that I would have to just quit my job and hide out until the following season.

SERIOUSLY! IT'S IOWA!!!

You better start preparing for this pretty soon, because we aren't going to go 30-0 against Iowa until 2042 - they play everyone tough, never get blown out the way that we were against Wisconsin and Michigan.

doesnt mean a damn thing.

 

[NUpolo8]

I hate that people seem to be worried about Iowa. Really? Iowa? Really? If Iowa ever beats us, I may just curl up on my bed and hide out until the bowl game. Actually, if we lose to Iowa, it probably means we won't be in a bowl game because we would have to suck that bad... which means that I would have to just quit my job and hide out until the following season.

SERIOUSLY! IT'S IOWA!!!

You better start preparing for this pretty soon, because we aren't going to go 30-0 against Iowa until 2042 - they play everyone tough, never get blown out the way that we were against Wisconsin and Michigan.

doesnt mean a damn thing.

It's also not true.

 

[Landlord]

I hate that people seem to be worried about Iowa. Really? Iowa? Really? If Iowa ever beats us, I may just curl up on my bed and hide out until the bowl game. Actually, if we lose to Iowa, it probably means we won't be in a bowl game because we would have to suck that bad... which means that I would have to just quit my job and hide out until the following season.

SERIOUSLY! IT'S IOWA!!!

You better start preparing for this pretty soon, because we aren't going to go 30-0 against Iowa until 2042 - they play everyone tough, never get blown out the way that we were against Wisconsin and Michigan.

I got 100 cents that says we do. Put your money where your mouth is, Landlord.

Alright, but seeing as you're already wrinkly old balls and won't live that long, how am I supposed to collect?