A Few Little Known Bo Pelini Facts

knownothing said:
Wally said:
knownothing said:
Wally said:
Also, is your negative statement about Plelini's career at NU not being up to the quality of Osborne's evidence of your own lack of respect showing?
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I wouldn't want to dis Bo, far from it. What do you think the chances are that he will be one of the greatest coaches in college football? The odds suggest he doesn't have much of a chance. Very few coaches make that list.

I'll sure will give him a chance, and I really do hope for the best. But, the odds are against him, as I am sure you understand. Bob Devaney, and Tom Osborne are a big act to live up to. It is unlikely that Bo will be that good. It's not at all negative, just true. We had an incredible run with Devaney and Osborne. Maybe never to be seen again.
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I've met negative people like yourself. You're ready to lose before the game is even played. I disagree with you wholeheartedly.
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I'm not at all negative about Pelini. I think he has a good chance to be a good coach for NU.

But what are the chances of any coach being as great as Osborne? Not good. He is unique.

Hey, I'm all for Pelini. I think he is a good choice. But will he be a great coach? Probably not. Most aren't ya know, even the good ones aren't as great as Os.

My guess is that Pelini will be a good thing for us. But a return to the glory days isn't likely to happen anytime soon. It's just the way football goes.

I'm all for Pelini and I will cheer for the Huskers. Just don't get disappointed if we aren't like the glory teams of the past.
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I'm not sure why you (or many other people on this board) seem to think that Bo Pelini is where the program starts and ends. You may doubt him, but from what I see, he is putting together a great cast of support for the program. Anyone who thinks that Bo Pelini coming to the program is in itself going to right the ship is naive. The key to the whole equation is exactly what TO is mentoring/helping Bo to do - build a great supporting cast. TO did not work in a vaccuum, and neither will Bo. That may be where Callahan got things wrong - you need support from the ground up, and he didn't seem to want to bring that type of teamwork to the program. Ask any leader or CEO, and they will tell you that their success comes from those people around him/her who are striving for excellence.

Bo has done remarkable things already to get this program back on its feet. I think he will be around for a while (more than his other mentor Frank), and I think within 4 years we will be vying for a National Championship. Add the talent to the scheme to the determination of this entire program, and you will see success. The difference between Callahan and Pelini will be the tradition and support of others in the program who will be able to contribute.

 
Oldschool said:
I'm not sure why you (or many other people on this board) seem to think that Bo Pelini is where the program starts and ends. You may doubt him, but from what I see, he is putting together a great cast of support for the program. Anyone who thinks that Bo Pelini coming to the program is in itself going to right the ship is naive. The key to the whole equation is exactly what TO is mentoring/helping Bo to do - build a great supporting cast. TO did not work in a vaccuum, and neither will Bo. That may be where Callahan got things wrong - you need support from the ground up, and he didn't seem to want to bring that type of teamwork to the program. Ask any leader or CEO, and they will tell you that their success comes from those people around him/her who are striving for excellence.

Bo has done remarkable things already to get this program back on its feet. I think he will be around for a while (more than his other mentor Frank), and I think within 4 years we will be vying for a National Championship. Add the talent to the scheme to the determination of this entire program, and you will see success. The difference between Callahan and Pelini will be the tradition and support of others in the program who will be able to contribute.
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thanks for offering your opinion, but you may want to repost this. This threads intention was made in joking form, to sarcastically suggest how tough our new head coach is...Unfortunately it has been taken much too literally...You may want to search other threads to post your thoughts, or possibly create one of your own. The majority of the posters here are not trying to compare Pelini to Osborne, nor are the actually suggesting that he can leap tall buildings in a single bound (though I believe that to be true).

 
Bo Pelini never retreats; he just attacks in the opposite direction.

Bo Pelini always tests positive for steroids. Not that he uses steroids. It's because steroids are made from Bo Pelini.

Bo Pelini could strangle you with a cordless phone.

Bo Pelini played Russian roulette with a fully loaded gun and won.

If Bo Pelini misspells a word, your dictionary is wrong.

A duck's quack does not echo. Bo Pelini is solely responsible for this phenomenon. When asked why he will simply stare at you, grimly.

Bo Pelini has never blinked in his entire life. Never.

Bo Pelini can divide by zero.

While urinating, Bo Pelini is easily capable of welding titanium.

Bo Pelini can touch MC Hammer.

Bo Pelini doesn’t wear a watch; HE decides what time it is.

Bo Pelini can blow bubbles with beef jerky.

Bo Pelini once participated in the running of the bulls. He walked.

Bo Pelini knows the last digit of pi.

Bo Pelini can jump-start a car using jumper cables attached to his nipples.

 
A duck's quack does not echo. Bo Pelini is solely responsible for this phenomenon. When asked why he will simply stare at you, grimly.

That is absolutely freaking fantastic

 
As for the person or people that cannot see the humor in this post you probably should wake up and smile every now and then or if you cant comprehend it just log off and spare us your dribble.

Back on topic.

When Pelini takes a swim, he doesn't get wet, the water gets Pelinied.

Bo Pelini doesn't read offenses. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

Before Chuck Norris goes to sleep at night, he checks his closet for Bo Pelini.

Bo Pelini could kill Chuck Norris nine different ways with his headset and four different ways with his play chart.

Bo Pelini sleeps with a night light. Not because he is afraid of the dark but because the dark is afraid of Bo.

Bo Pelini doesn't fart, he detonates

Superman wears Bo Pelini pajamas to bed.

Bo Pelini didn't hang the moon. He stared down an asteroid and it stopped in it's tracks.

Bo Pelini's calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd; no one fools Bo Pelini.

Bo Pelini was originally cast as the main character in 24, but was replaced by the producers when he managed to kill every terrorist and save the day in 12 minutes and 37 seconds.

Bo Pelini doesn't cut his grass, he dares it to grow.

They say that Superman's only weakness is kryptonite. Bo Pelini laughs at Superman for having a weakness.

Bo Pelini's dog is trained to pick up his own poop because Bo Pelini will not take sh*t from anyone

Bo Pelini once partook in a pissing contest outside of a bar. His opponent drowned.

Bo Pelini can build a snowman out of rain.

Bo Pelini's wristwatch has no numbers on it. It just says, "Time to kick a$$."

 
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BO is so HOT:

--He really left LSU 'cause he thinks Big Red matches his eyes better.

--His idea of a barbecue is holding a raw burger in his palm.

--He once did a firewalking workshop...on the sun.

--He thinks Icarus was a wuss.

--He chews on raw jalopenas like they was 'candy'.

--He's hotter than Angelina Jolie--and he's a dude.

 
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Huskerhead1976 said:
As for the person or people that cannot see the humor in this post you probably should wake up and smile every now and then or if you cant comprehend it just log off and spare us your dribble.

Back on topic.

When Pelini takes a swim, he doesn't get wet, the water gets Pelinied.

Bo Pelini doesn't read offenses. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

Before Chuck Norris goes to sleep at night, he checks his closet for Bo Pelini.

Bo Pelini could kill Chuck Norris nine different ways with his headset and four different ways with his play chart.

Bo Pelini sleeps with a night light. Not because he is afraid of the dark but because the dark is afraid of Bo.

Bo Pelini doesn't fart, he detonates

Superman wears Bo Pelini pajamas to bed.

Bo Pelini didn't hang the moon. He stared down an asteroid and it stopped in it's tracks.

Bo Pelini's calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd; no one fools Bo Pelini.

Bo Pelini was originally cast as the main character in 24, but was replaced by the producers when he managed to kill every terrorist and save the day in 12 minutes and 37 seconds.

Bo Pelini doesn't cut his grass, he dares it to grow.

They say that Superman's only weakness is kryptonite. Bo Pelini laughs at Superman for having a weakness.

Bo Pelini's dog is trained to pick up his own poop because Bo Pelini will not take sh*t from anyone

Bo Pelini once partook in a pissing contest outside of a bar. His opponent drowned.

Bo Pelini can build a snowman out of rain.

Bo Pelini's wristwatch has no numbers on it. It just says, "Time to kick a$$."
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Replace 'S' with 'P'.

 
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A few more tidbits about Bo...

"Bo Pelini is the father of every kid in this town!"

"Bo Pelini once showed me a video of him making love to my wife, and it was the most beautiful thing I ever saw!"

"One time I was with Bo Pelini in the back of a pickup truck, along with a live deer. Pelini goes up to the deer and says, 'I'm Bo Pelini! SAY IT!' Then he manipulates the deer's lips in such a way as to make it say, 'Bopelini' ... It wasn't exactly like it, but it was pretty good for a deer!'"

"He'd eat a homeless person if you dared him!"

"His poop is used as currency in Argentina."

"He sweats Gatorade"

"He once breast-fed a flamingo back to health."

"He hated Mexicans! And he was half Mexican! .......And he hated irony!"

"I once saw him scissor kick Angela Landsbury."

"He sheds his skin once a year."

"He did 3 tours in 'Nam...... I was in Corpus Christi on business a month ago. I had this eight foot tall Asian waiter, which made me curious. I asked him his name. Sure enough it's Ho Tran Pelini!"

"I once saw him eat a whole live chicken."

"His favorite movie is 'One on One' with Robby Benson."

"He sleeps eight hours a night! ........ well, he was pretty normal when it came to that."

"Bo Pelini was a two ton man-mountain who could palm a medicine ball!"

"Did I ever tell you about the time Pelini took me out to go get a drink with him? We go off looking for a bar and we can't find one. Finally Pelini takes me to a vacant lot and says, 'Here we are.' We sat there for a year and a half and sure enough someone constructs a bar around us. The day they opened we ordered a shot, drank it, and then burned the place to the ground. Pelini yelled over the roar of the flames, 'Always leave things the way you found em!'"

"He once punched a hole in a cow just to see who was coming up the road."

"He taught me how to make love to a woman, and how to scold a child."

"They found $60 in change in his stomach."

"He did all the makeup on the 'Planet of the Apes' movie."

"He grew a 3rd arm and kept it in a vault."

"Pelini drank a full glass of liquid LSD with his eggs. Then he slept for 8 months straight. When he woke he rubbed his eyes and said, 'All in all, I prefer gin.'"

"They say Gene Roddenbery got the idea for Star Trek from listening to Pelini talk in his sleep."

"He date raped David Bowie."

"He once inhaled a seagull."

"The Pope told him it was ok to have a mistress."

"It was the sight of Pelini's naked body that drove Brian Wilson insane."

"He once had sex with a cigarette machine."

"He killed Wolfman Jack with a trident."

"He uses the Shroud of Turin as a golf towel."

"He once ate the Bible while water skiing."

"He drives an ice cream truck covered in human skulls."

"He sired a baseball team.. an orchestra if you count the bastards!"

"You know, he would shoot whiskey into his neck with a syringe!"

"He has dandruff the size of mice!"

"He jogged with a fridge on his back!"

"Bo Pelini was a 10 foot monster who slept with all our wives! And punched us all in the face! And we loved him for it!"

"His first name is Bo! ....... I'm drunk."

"He's a ten foot tall beastman who showers in vodka and feeds his baby shrimp scampi."

"He orchestrated the merger between Unicef and Smith & Wessen."

"He went public with his own buttocks and made $7 million."

"Did I ever tell you about the time Pelini went hunting? Pelini decides he's going to hunt down all four of the Banana Splits. He stalks and kills every one of them with a machette. They all begged for their lives...except Fleagle."

"We once had a bachelor party for Pelini. He ate the entire cake before we could tell him there was a stripper in it."

"Pelini once hosted the Grammys and gave every award to Corey Hart."

"He has a toenail on the end of his penis."

"Pelini once got his wife pregnant and she gave birth to a delicious 16 ounce steak. The after birth was sauteed mushrooms."

"Pelini's family crest is a picture of a baracudda eating Neil Armstrong."

"Pelini ranked 18th in the AP College Football Pool."

"Did I ever tell you about the time Bo Pelini was in a production of, 'The King & I?' On opening night, Pelini chloroforms the entire cast and slowly eats them in front of the audience for two hours. The production got pretty good reviews."

"He breastfeeds John Madden."

"Pelini named the group Sha-Na-Na. They did NOT want to be called that."

"If you drop a phonograph needle on Pelini's nipple, it plays the Beach Boys' 'Pet Sounds.'"

"They use Pelini's foreskin as a tarp when it rains at Yankee stadium."

"Pelini directed that commercial where the women play basketball in high heels."

"All the 'Yes' album covers are Pelini family photos."

"He wears a live rattlesnake as a condom."

"Did I ever tell you about the time he taught his son how to drive? He did it by entering him in the Indy 500. The kid wrecked and died. Pelini said it would've happened sometime."

"Pelini's semen can form into a liquid human - like the guy from 'Terminator 2'"

"Pelini still believes in Santa Claus, and he wants to put him in porno films."

"He thinks then iron man is gay."

"He framed Roger Rabbit."

"He gave a handjob to a manta ray."

 
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