Drunk

Eric the Red

Team HuskerBoard
A WOMAN WAS SHOPPING AT HER LOCAL SUPERMARKET WHERE SHE

> SELECTED:

>

>

> 1 HALF-GALLON OF 2% MILK,

> 1 DOZEN EGGS,

> 1 QUART OF ORANGE JUICE,

> 1 HEAD OF ROMAINE LETTUCE,

> 2 LBS. OF COFFEE,

> 1 LB. PACKAGE OF BACON.

>

> AS SHE WAS UNLOADING HER ITEMS ON THE CONVEYOR BELT TO

> CHECK OUT, A DRUNK STANDING BEHIND HER WATCHED AS SHE

> PLACED THE ITEMS IN FRONT OF THE CASHIER. WHILE THE

> CASHIER WAS RINGING UP HER PURCHASES, THE DRUNK CALMLY

> STATED," YOU MUST BE SINGLE."

>

>

> THE WOMAN WAS A BIT STARTLED BY THIS PROCLAMATION, BUT

> SHE WAS INTRIGUED BY THE DERELICT'S INTUITION, SINCE

> SHE WAS INDEED SINGLE. SHE LOOKED AT HER SIX ITEMS ON

> THE BELT AND SAW NOTHING PARTICULARLY UNUSUAL ABOUT HER SELECTIONS THAT

> COULD HAVE TIPPED OFF THE DRUNK TO HER MARITAL STATUS.

>

> CURIOSITY GETTING THE BETTER OF HER, SHE SAID "WELL,

> YOU KNOW WHAT,YOU'RE ABSOLUTELY CORRECT. BUT HOW ON

> EARTH DID YOU KNOW THAT?"

>

>

>

> THE DRUNK REPLIED, "'CAUSE YOU'RE UGLY."

 
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