Friend Zone maybe AND shes having bf issues

Going back to the OP:

I agree with a lot of the advice on this thread. UGA is absolutely right in saying that you don't want to be the one who caused them to break up. It doesn't give much credibility to you and you look like a pansy (for nice words sake). Be a man and let everything be. I'm a firm believer in whatever's supposed to happen will happen, and that everything happens for a reason. Maybe she's been with this other guy and it will show her how good of a guy you actually are, in comparison to him. On the other hand, there is a chance that she will never see you as anything more than a friend, which is ok too. I've never been big on becoming a friend and then dating, because you're then risking a friendship. Personally, I would let the two of them fall apart on their own, and be there for her if she needs you, and then gauge her interest carefully. If another makeout session ensues, chances are she's into you or she's drunk. So be careful, but I'd stay back. If she doesn't come to you, it's just not meant to be right now.

 
This thread is all over the place but very, very, entertaining.

I think that you just need to tell her how you feel. If she says "I dont like you like that", then atleast you know, and could potentially still be friends, but you'd know to move on. If she says "I like you too", it is not directly breaking her up by saying malicious things about her current bf, it'd be her choice to leave him and go with you.

Truly the only way to pole vault yourself out of the friends zone (I like to think of it as a deep, dark hole) is to just say it.

 
zoogies said:
I agree that the boyfriend complicates the situation. And I wouldn't suggest you tell her he's a DB, or tell her to break up with him. That comes off as pretty douchey. OTOH, I don't think hiding your feelings is the way to go either, if they are there. Unless there's a sensible, important reason other than worry.
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I couldn't agree with you more. Leave that out of the equation. She knows what type of guy he is and you are. She should be able to figure that out, but she might be one of those girls who likes db's :dunno Instead of running her current bf in the ground, listen to her, tell he that she is a great girl (if that's the way you feel), and that she deserves better.

 
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After thinking about this a lot, I'm just gonna let her go and be her friend. If something is meant to happen it will happen in time. I'm gonna stop beating myself up over her and move on. It's still gonna take a little to get used to this new mindset, but in the long run I think it will be better for both of us. I am not gonna remain shackled to her when there are tons of other great girls out there. And like I said, who knows what the future holds.

 
cHUSKERis said:
After thinking about this a lot, I'm just gonna let her go and be her friend. If something is meant to happen it will happen in time. I'm gonna stop beating myself up over her and move on. It's still gonna take a little to get used to this new mindset, but in the long run I think it will be better for both of us. I am not gonna remain shackled to her when there are tons of other great girls out there. And like I said, who knows what the future holds.
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Good call. Best to move on.

The part in bold, I hear that all the time. Call my cynical, but I don't believe in that "If it's meant to be, it will" B.S.

Good luck to you :thumbs And if you find one or two too many "great" girls out there, let me know, I've yet to find one. <_<

 
cHUSKERis said:
After thinking about this a lot, I'm just gonna let her go and be her friend. If something is meant to happen it will happen in time. I'm gonna stop beating myself up over her and move on. It's still gonna take a little to get used to this new mindset, but in the long run I think it will be better for both of us. I am not gonna remain shackled to her when there are tons of other great girls out there. And like I said, who knows what the future holds.
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Give the man a Blackshirt.

 
Boooooo

Enjoy being afraid of taking a chance and spending the rest of your life wavering in a pity pool of "What if" sorrow.

Never turn down a car without at least taking it for a test drive.

 
Pretty liberal use of "have a boyfriend". The door is open-or at the very, very least-cracked open.

Sounds like he's on his way out, and somebody else is going to be on their way in-it's up to you to find out whether that's going to be you or someone else.

 
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