Now that I am not a coach and just a parent.....

StPaulHusker

StPaulHusker

Banned
So I told my wife that I would take the next few sports seasons off from coaching my son's teams because while I was coaching, she never really got to see him play because she was chasing my toddler twin boys around all the time. It was no big deal for me to step away and let her enjoy watching him play. We even rotate practices.

So my son is in a flag football league made up of 1st and 2nd graders. He is a second grader and one of the 3 biggest kids on the team. He is somewhat timid in his play but that's because football is fairly new to him.

His coach is very good. The first couple of practices and the first game, he kept the kids engaged and taught them a lot. He said his goal this year was to have fun and learn football so the boys are prepared for tackle next year if they go that route.

Obviously, there are kids with a better feel for the game than others. And more coordinated. My son is in the middle of the pack. Big and strong but not agile or fleet of foot.

So the first game, everyone played pretty much even number of snaps. Each half is 24 plays. No problem. Then came last Wednesday's practice. He took what I would call his favorite 7 (out of 13) and had them run offensive plays all practice while the other 6 did blocking drills the whole practice.

Then last night's game he split the squads in 2. His favorite 7 and the other 6. The thought was that the squads would rotate in and out as a unit. Sounded good. Except that 4 of his favorite 7 played the entire game. While in the second half, he put the other 6 in with only 6-8 plays left in the game. My son is with the other 6. I almost went up to him during the game to remind him that there were other players on the team not getting to play but held my tongue.

So this morning, I sent him a message letting him know that while I appreciate his efforts to win games, the purpose of this league is to teach and have fun and all kids at this age need to play equally to get experience.

When I was coaching, I always made a point to make it equal play for the kids and winning never concerned me. So was I right or wrong to send the message. Or if you are a coach, do you appreciate the constructive criticism?

 
At that age, in my opinion, no, youre not wrong. Theyre 7-8 year olds. They have plenty of time for "playing for a reason" after they learn the game.

I coached my 6 year old's baseball team this past summer. I am coaching 1st and 2nd grade flag football. While I am engraining into my son's head that you play to win the game, you dont do so at all costs. I will play everyone equal. I think it's a vulnerable age to be giving kids mixed signals that theyre not good enough. I had a rotation on the baseball team so that every player played every position equal time.

Ive also a person who beleives the first 1-2 years playing a sport should not keep score. Let them learn the game and the basics without worrying about trying to win. But after that, make it for something. Unfortunately in our town, baseball has 4 years of no score. I think that's absurd, but it is what it is. I think about 5th and 6th grade is a good time to start introducing the "best players play" concept, cuz once they get to junior high, that's how it is, and the weeding begins.

I dont think you were out of line. And i think the coach needs to step back some and realize the age group he's workin with. Just my opinion.

 
Count 'Bility said:
At that age, in my opinion, no, youre not wrong. Theyre 7-8 year olds. They have plenty of time for "playing for a reason" after they learn the game.

I coached my 6 year old's baseball team this past summer. I am coaching 1st and 2nd grade flag football. While I am engraining into my son's head that you play to win the game, you dont do so at all costs. I will play everyone equal. I think it's a vulnerable age to be giving kids mixed signals that theyre not good enough. I had a rotation on the baseball team so that every player played every position equal time.

Ive also a person who beleives the first 1-2 years playing a sport should not keep score. Let them learn the game and the basics without worrying about trying to win. But after that, make it for something. Unfortunately in our town, baseball has 4 years of no score. I think that's absurd, but it is what it is. I think about 5th and 6th grade is a good time to start introducing the "best players play" concept, cuz once they get to junior high, that's how it is, and the weeding begins.

I dont think you were out of line. And i think the coach needs to step back some and realize the age group he's workin with. Just my opinion.
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Thanks. As far as I am concerned, they can keep score. I just think the coach emphasizing it is the problem.

He has yet to respond to me so I am not sure if he takes constructive criticism well or not.

 
I got a few of those messages from parents when I coached baseball. The difference was I coached in a competitive league. Started when they were nine and they were twelve this last year. And while it wasn't equal playing time, all the kids played every game. I didn't care if people weren't happy with the playing time, if you're not happy, leave. Go join another team and see if the grass is greener on the other side. We were playing teams that were playing to win (some teams only played/batted nine, so the others sat the whole game), so I played my best players the whole game and the others rotated. It wasn't that I liked them better, as I don't have kids of my own so Im not biased, but they were just better players.

With that being said, at the age youre talking, it probably isn't right to split them up like that. It doesn't sound like a competitive league. But if youre getting upset about it now, Id really think about putting your kid into competitive leagues when he gets older. Probably the best route to go is in-house leagues if equal playing time is important to you.

 
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As for score, I agree with huKser. The kids keep score anyway. When my kids were in no score leagues, after the game, they all would run up to their parents and either talk about the score.

As for playing time, I agree pretty much with what Po Belini said. If you are in a competitive league, everyone should play but you are there to win. So, best players play more.

If you are in a league like what you are describing, I agree with you that all kids should get very close to the same playing time. I will say that with one exception. When my son started playing tackle football, there were a few kids in his class that went out but simply didn't understand. One of those kids was so small I thought he was going to get killed every play. At that age, there can be huge differences in size and some of the bigger kids would have fun seeing how hard they could hit the smaller kids. His coach handled this fairly well by putting them in the games but in certain situational places so to get them playing time but not get them killed.

I have coached enough to know it is frustrating. No matter what you do someone is going to complain. So, I like how you did it by sending him a message after the game. That showed that it's not the heat of the game and emotional.

 
Po Belini is very correct in his statement. And I have no problem putting him in a competitive league as he gets older. Because he will have more experience and he will understand that hard work gets you the time to play. Not just my checkbook.

But this league is a learning league that is supposed to prepare them in some ways for the start of tackle next year. Kids this age need to play to keep them interested. The sidelines becomes a circus because the kids don't understand to just sit an watch what is going on during play.

But the coach did respond to me. He essentially denied my concern or qualified his actions. Which leads me to believe that he realizes that someone paid attention. He has 2 practices and a game this week. I guess we will see if things are different now that he knows I'm watching.

Also-thanks for the feedback.

 
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