TheCropDuster
Five-Star Recruit
Since we are 8 days from the start of the 2006 season, I thought we should compile a list of the unwritten rules of being a Husker fan on football Saturday in Lincoln. Here is a few that I came up with. Please add, subtract, do whatever makes you happy. Its almost time people!!!!
1. Wear red. For god sakes its called the “Sea of Red”, not the “Sea of Gray”, “Sea of White” or the “Sea of Old Navy Shirts”. But if you have trouble finding a red Husker shirt here’s a little tip that’ll help you out in finding one. Try, oh I don’t know, looking at almost EVERY SINGLE STORE IN THE STATE OF NEBRASKA!!! You can’t throw a dead cat without hitting a red Husker shirt. Hell I think your even given one when your either are born here or cross the border.
2. Stand up and make noise. Here is a simple mathematical formula. Loud noise + scared to death QB = Face mask into field turf with the possibility of some Chad May bitching. But here’s another formula you might want to keep in mind as well. Blue hair old lady that was a Bugeater fan before she was a Husker fan + telling you to sit down = Old lady looking at your backside the rest of the game as she remembers the glory days of Dana X. Bible. These two formulas will add up to one hell of a time.
3. Throw up the bones AND after a 3 & out, do the 3 & out symbol with your hand. If you don’t know what throwing up the bones or what the 3 & out hand gesture is, check your tickets and Husker gear in at the door and journey down to Craphatten and painfully purchase some god awful purple to become a woeful K-SUCKS fan.
4. Do two pre-game traditions; one old and one new. Touch the bottom of the foot of the elephant in front of Morrill Hall and touch the cleat of the last tackler in the statue just outside the east side of the stadium. You’ll feel like a dork and you’ll look like a dork but dammit, it has to be done.
5. Do not partake in the wave. God how I wish this completely uncool maneuver could have a disclaimer on the back of the ticket stud. “Bearer of this ticket shall not bring in any alcohol, firearms, throw things on the field and participate in the wave…”
6. Cheer all visiting teams out of the stadium except for one. That’s Colorado. They do not need to be cheered for anything, except for actually completing a full sentence without spitting out Coors Light backwash, marijuana residue and cousin splatter.
7. At halftime, go ahead and get your hot dog, go to the bathroom or accidentally spill some Jack Daniels into your Pepsi. The band hasn’t had an interesting performance since RFK almost became President. Just make sure that your back in time to politely clap them off the field and be ready for the second half.
1. Wear red. For god sakes its called the “Sea of Red”, not the “Sea of Gray”, “Sea of White” or the “Sea of Old Navy Shirts”. But if you have trouble finding a red Husker shirt here’s a little tip that’ll help you out in finding one. Try, oh I don’t know, looking at almost EVERY SINGLE STORE IN THE STATE OF NEBRASKA!!! You can’t throw a dead cat without hitting a red Husker shirt. Hell I think your even given one when your either are born here or cross the border.
2. Stand up and make noise. Here is a simple mathematical formula. Loud noise + scared to death QB = Face mask into field turf with the possibility of some Chad May bitching. But here’s another formula you might want to keep in mind as well. Blue hair old lady that was a Bugeater fan before she was a Husker fan + telling you to sit down = Old lady looking at your backside the rest of the game as she remembers the glory days of Dana X. Bible. These two formulas will add up to one hell of a time.
3. Throw up the bones AND after a 3 & out, do the 3 & out symbol with your hand. If you don’t know what throwing up the bones or what the 3 & out hand gesture is, check your tickets and Husker gear in at the door and journey down to Craphatten and painfully purchase some god awful purple to become a woeful K-SUCKS fan.
4. Do two pre-game traditions; one old and one new. Touch the bottom of the foot of the elephant in front of Morrill Hall and touch the cleat of the last tackler in the statue just outside the east side of the stadium. You’ll feel like a dork and you’ll look like a dork but dammit, it has to be done.
5. Do not partake in the wave. God how I wish this completely uncool maneuver could have a disclaimer on the back of the ticket stud. “Bearer of this ticket shall not bring in any alcohol, firearms, throw things on the field and participate in the wave…”
6. Cheer all visiting teams out of the stadium except for one. That’s Colorado. They do not need to be cheered for anything, except for actually completing a full sentence without spitting out Coors Light backwash, marijuana residue and cousin splatter.
7. At halftime, go ahead and get your hot dog, go to the bathroom or accidentally spill some Jack Daniels into your Pepsi. The band hasn’t had an interesting performance since RFK almost became President. Just make sure that your back in time to politely clap them off the field and be ready for the second half.
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