Don't F**K with Chuck...

If I never see one of those again it will be too soon.
ok, when chuck norris does push-ups he doesn't push himself up, he pushes the earth down.

or, Before the boogey man goes to sleep at night, he checks his closet for chuck norris

and my favorite, Chuck Norris has two speeds. Walk. and Kill

 
This one's my favorite.....

If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, "Two seconds 'til." After you ask, "Two seconds 'til what?" he roundhouse kicks you in the face.

Hell.....all of them crack me up.

 
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