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Book Em Horns


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I had nothing to do with writing these but some of them are pretty funny. Enjoy!

 

1. What do you call a drug ring in Austin?

 

A huddle.

 

 

 

2. Four UT Longhorns in a car, who's driving?

 

The police.

 

 

 

3. The UT Longhorns have adopted a new "Honor System".

 

Yes your Honor, No your Honor.

 

 

 

4. The UT Longhorns knew they had to do something for their defense, so they hired a new defensive coordinator:

 

F. Lee Bailey.

 

 

 

5. How do the UT Longhorns spend their first week at fall practice? Studying their Miranda Rights.

 

 

 

6. What do you say to a Longhorn in a suit?

 

Will the defendant please rise?

 

 

 

7. If you see Longhorn football player on a bike, why don't you swerve to hit him?

 

It might be your bike!

 

 

 

8. The Longhorns employ scouts. But to look out for cops, not to scout high school kids.

 

 

 

9. I heard a rumor that the Texas Department of Corrections plans build a new prison in Austin, Texas in order to allow Longhorns to walk to school.

 

 

 

10. What do you call it, when a Longhorn goes on vacation?

 

Time off for good behavior.

 

 

 

11. Why couldn't the Longhorn get into a huddle on the football field?

 

It's a parole violation to associate with known felons.

 

 

 

12. Obviously Coach Mack Brown is not paying his players, if they have to resort to robbing people.

 

 

 

13. Book 'em, Horns!

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