ColoNoCoHusker Posted September 28, 2016 Share Posted September 28, 2016 A lot of heated debate going on lately between election year, undefeated football team, and all the other activities. As a "thank you" to everyone for participating and keeping it civil, I created my Presidential Cabinet out of HB members. This is not meant to insult anyone, simply to thank everyone for keeping the board interesting to read! Vice President - Knapplc: Dick Chenney style insider/lackey. They went to grade school together (I hear). Plus, he's powerful by virtue of having always been powerful. He's the Kardashian of HuskerBoard...Secretary of:State - Moiraine: I actually debated putting her as VP but she'd be a better President than me. I want to keep her a couple steps away in succession to keep the snipers at bay. Plus, she's the only one on Huskerboard that could take Putin, bare-knuckle style boxing. No matter the topic, has something interesting to contribute.Treasury - Eric the Red: Not always in the convo but when he is, people listen. Plus he's kept HB afloat without turning it into an ad server so. When he steps down for paying his personal car payment out of the travel account, NUance will take over.Defense - BlitzFirst: On the one-hand, need someone that can heavy-hand the generals and make stuff "get real, fast". On the other hand, don't tell him about the nuclear option...Justice/Attorney General - The Dude: Weighs both sides before commenting and neither side is happy... but he's not wrong.Interior - Big red surfers: Took my first joke re: BLM (Bureau of Land Management). You know what they say - "You brought it up, you fix it"...Agriculture - Hoosker: Was going to say Interior but realized this is the type of person that could get MJ legalized as a cash crop. It was a lateral move but less pay and further from the Presidency. Congrats!Commerce - BigRedBuster: Knows how it goes, and how it works. Still trying to get everyone else to do so...Labor - IA State Husker: Wasn't born to the Big Red, didn't go to school there. Has to work twice as hard for the reps.Health & Human Services - ColoradoHusk: This was one of the hardest to place. Ultimately, I put him where he could focus on: 1) Eradicating STDs; and, 2) Providing tax credits for Ubers at peak late night hours. Win-win.Housing & Urban Development - LOMS: He knows how to collect rent and has struggled through going from the 3rd largest city in the state to a ghost-town within a few hours... We'll see if stability is possible.Transportation - TITANIC VS LUSITANIA: Did not check references, chosen on name alone. BTW, anybody seen our ship?!?Energy - Dewiz: Lots of energy, even when wrong. Seems to have a sense a humor so it works outEducation - Guy Chamberlin: Guy drops lots of knowledge, constantly, but without Mod/Admin access.Veterans Affairs - NebraskaShellback: Curses like a sailor, Navy Veteran, like his style. 'Nuff saidHomeland Security - GBRHouston or bnilhome: I have faith either would make the CIA, FBI, and NSA looks like amateurs within a few years...White House Chief of Staff - Zoogs: This is the 2nd most powerful person in Washington D.C. Smart enough to know never be first in line (they get shot)... Behind the scense power broker. Wicked Smart...Environmental Protection Agency (Administrator) - RedDenver: Nepotism, pure & simple.Office of Management & Budget (Director) - cm husker: Another tough one. Ultimately, he always gets under everyone's skin and busts their chops whether needed or not. Cabinet member most likely to go to prison for corruption...United States Trade Representative (Ambassador) - Lyons in the Sea of Red: Lots of good posts, but not much rep. Always overshadowed but you will notice if he leaves...United States Mission to the United Nations (Ambassador) - BigWillie: First, cannot have a name like that NOT be in the Cabinet. Second, who wouldn't want to give the UN a BigWillie?!?Council of Economic Advisers (Chairman) - ADS: On the surface, seems like a brain trust. Short & simple good posts. After a while, you start searching for listening devices...Small Business Administration (Administrator) - gobiggergoredder: SBA is to small business as the black plague was to Eurasia's population. Why change what doesn't work?Other:Special Assistant to the President & Secretary of Keepin' It Real - TeacherCD: He took 8 of the top 10 candidate spots. If you don't know why, you haven't been around HB very long. No Carl Pelini contact as condition of employement, tho... CIA Director - Count 'Bility: I would not want an apostrophist as head of the FBI. Considered for Secretary of Defense but Jorts are NOT allowed at Cabinet meetings.White House Intern - MattyIce: Just seems like a good fit.Security Detail - Savage Husker: Seems like a good guy to take a bullet for me, lulz 4 Link to comment
zoogs Posted September 29, 2016 Share Posted September 29, 2016 Our President can do his own tech support. He's real handy in a pinch Link to comment
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