Youthful Shenanigans

Cina said:
ShawnWatson said:
Cina said:
ShawnWatson said:
Do you know those "Do Not Remove Under the Penalty of Law" labels they put on mattresses? Wells lets just say somebody around here is pretty crazy and doesn't care much for rules.
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Yeah, me.

Cina said:
I tore that tag off my mattress.
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IF YOU'RE SO BIG AND BAD TELL ME WHAT MOVIE THAT IS FROM.
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I'm way too cool to know that's from Pee-Wee's Big Adventure.

Wait...
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I'M PRETTY IMPRESSED.

 
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Most people my age are out there partying. And I'm on a Nebraska message board.

 
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So there I am, in Sri Lanka, formerly Ceylon, at about 3 o'clock in the morning, looking for one thousand brown M&Ms to fill a brandy glass, or Ozzy wouldn't go on stage that night. So, Jeff Beck pops his head 'round the door, and mentions there's a little sweets shop on the edge of town. So - we go. And - it's closed. So there's me, and Keith Moon, and David Crosby, breaking into that little sweets shop, eh. Well, instead of a guard dog, they've got this bloody great big Bengal tiger. I managed to take out the tiger with a can of mace, but the shop owner and his son . . . that's a different story altogether. I had to beat them to death with their own shoes. Nasty business, really. But, sure enough, I got the M&Ms, and Ozzy went on stage and did a great show.

 
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  • We were somewhere around Barstow on the edge of the desert when the drugs began to take hold. I remember saying something like "I feel a bit lightheaded; maybe you should drive..." And suddenly there was a terrible roar all around us and the sky was full of what looked like huge bats, all swooping and screeching and diving around the car, which was going about a hundred miles an hour with the top down to Las Vegas. And a voice was screaming: "Holy Jesus! What are these goddamn animals?"

  • The sporting editors had also given me $300 in cash, most of which was already spent on extremely dangerous drugs. The trunk of the car looked like a mobile police narcotics lab. We had two bags of grass, seventy-five pellets of mescaline, five sheets of high-powered blotter acid, a salt shaker half full of cocaine, and a whole galaxy of multi-colored uppers, downers, screamers, laughers and also a quart of tequila, a quart of rum, a case of Budweiser, a pint of raw ether and two dozen amyls. Not that we needed all that for the trip, but once you get locked into a serious drug-collection, the tendency is to push it as far as you can.
    The only thing that really worried me was the ether. There is nothing in the world more helpless and irresponsible and depraved than a man in the depths of an ether binge. And I knew we'd get into that rotten stuff pretty soon.

  • How long can we maintain? I wonder. How long before one of us starts raving and jabbering at this boy? What will he think then? This same lonely desert was the last known home of the Manson family. Will he make that grim connection...

  • No point mentioning those bats, I thought. The poor bastard will see them soon enough.

 
Drank all day yesterday for the game, around 7 some buddies and I ran to Hyvee to buy more beer and I buy a bottle of Pendleton. That was my last clear memory.

#shenanigans

 
I was in a dark place when I was 19. Bad bad breakup that wouldn't leave my life, really affected my decision making. One night a rambunctious fellow I knew (Sooner Fan) and I were out late at night booze cruising. Late in the evening he asked me to pull into the local 9 hole golf course. Thinking he needed to take a leak I obliged. He jumped out of my car and ran to the cart garage. A few moments later in the dark of the night I see my companion backing out on a golf cart. Not knowing what to think I say "what the hell are you doing?". Finally he convinces me to jump on and ride shotgun because he had found a cart with a cooler of luke warm beer.

After about 5 minutes of pitch black booze cruising on a golf cart he gets the bright idea to find another cart that I can now drive. Once he coaxed me into it we sped off in different directions. After finally locating him the two of us were on a crash course towards eachother. Neither of us veered off and our game of chicken resulted in a head on collision. When a golf cart hits something the steering wheel does a couple 360's. It hurt, but damn was it funny. The demo derby was now officially on. He would hit me and vice versa. At one point he knocked over a bench that I immediately ramped, got decent air. Drove through a nearby field which was a sh**ty idea.

Eventually it started getting light out and the steering on my cart gave out. So in one final act of idiocy my companion drove right through a storage locker garage door. I'd like to tell you we got away with it but you see my friend was about as dumb as they come and he told alot of people about our misdeeds. Maybe two weeks later we were caught. Felony was dropped but it cost me alot since he ended up fleeing back to Oklahoma, don't know if he ever paid his share. Probably my 2nd biggest regrettable act during my late teens.

 
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