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Strangled Lawyer


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Irregular News for 05.35.06

 

Boston, MA -- A man charged with murder in Massachusetts was so angry with his lawyer's performance he attacked the attorney in court, trying to strangle him as a shocked judge looked on, Boston radio reported on Wednesday.

 

"I think he just didn't like the way some of the rulings the judge was making was going yesterday morning," attorney Bruce Carroll told WBZ Radio of the Tuesday morning attack by defendant John Gomes in Boston's Suffolk Superior Court.

 

"He eventually stood up, started saying something and reached over and grabbed me by the throat," said Carroll.

 

Several officers intervened before the 6-foot, 250-pound Gomes was separated from Carroll, the radio reported. Carroll had tried to withdraw from the case last week but the judge denied his request.

 

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Fry him!  Burn him at the stake!  Electrocute him!

 

This man has earned the death penalty!

...or perhaps 10 hours of community service should do the trick :dumdum

That's not a bad idea. Sort of like this...

 

One afternoon a wealthy lawyer was riding in his limousine when he saw two men along the roadside eating grass. Disturbed, he ordered his driver to stop and he got out to investigate.

 

He asked one man, "Why are you eating grass?"

 

"We don't have any money for food," the poor man replied. "We have to eat grass."

 

"Well, then, you can come with me to my house and I'll feed you" the lawyer said.

 

"But, sir, I have a wife and two children with me. They are over there, under that tree."

 

"Bring them along," the lawyer replied.

 

Turning to the other poor man he stated, "You come with us also."

 

The second man, in a pitiful voice then said, "But, sir, I also have a wife and six children with me!"

 

"Bring them all, as well," the lawyer answered.

 

They all entered the car, which was no easy task, even for a car as large as the limousine. Once underway, one of the poor fellows turned to the lawyer and said, "Sir, you are too kind. Thank you for taking all of us with you."

 

The lawyer replied, "Glad to do it. You'll really love my place; the grass is almost a foot high!"

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