Frank Discussion

Since I don't have a password to the woodhsed, I'll just tell you to blow it our your a** here.

Why would Superman wear a pith helmet, anyway? I just don't get that at all.

Mangino. Lew Perkins wants his own guy, and the training table bills are going through the roof.

Next time I will. I just wanted to register my belief that the "stike" was pure unadulterated horsesh*t. Thank you.

...for "disrespecting a member." If that's strike-worthy, then I'm screwed. There's not a soul here whom I respect, unless Barry Goldwater or Jackie Gleason happen to be alive and lurking on this site. But what sucks was that I got a strike for a relatively non-insulting post. All I did was make the observation that one of the newer posters here, who apparently recalls the world before mass production of automobiles, would soon be leaving us; thus, it wouldn't be fiscally prudent to put escalators in Memorial Stadium. Is that so offensive...? People here need to thicken their skins. Jesus.

Our chances of being 6-0 are almost as good as the chances of a Nirvana reuinion tour. The Tech game will be like a love scene from "Oz," and it is by no means a sure thing that we beat Wake or Pitt. I really hate to shatter anyone's illusions, but we're not good. And when you're not good, you don't run around predicting 9-2, 6-0, harvests of gold or sunshine on the mountains. You shut up until you don't suck any more, and then you can puff out your chest. Let's earn it before we spend it. We sucked last year, and there is a fairly decent chance that we will suck again this year.

You could go stand outside during a lightning storm, holding aloft the weeny fork from your set of BBQ tools. It's not a perfect solution, but you wouldn't be troubled by the automatic e-mails...

The kid is a player. The only problem is that we're going to have to put up with an entire season of cheeseball Rose calling him "The Flying Nunn," or something asinine like that.

Are you calling Coach Callahan a "one trick pony"? Uh, no. Unless the Italian chefs you know only know how to make chicken parmesan. If Bill Callahan was capable of putting a team on the field that led the NFL in rushing, I don't see why he couldn't run the option or something like it, given that the personnel he'd inherited were all holdovers from the old regime. But that's a moot point. He could've won six or seven and gotten us to a bowl game if he'd done so, but he chose what he did... To our detriment. Yay, Bill.

(1) 30 years, give or take... (2) Nature (3) Born in Valentine (4) Southlake, TX (5) '95 Orange Bowl (6) The day we hired Bill Callahan instead of Pellini (7) Too many to count--between home, road and bowls, easily 100+ (8) See above (9) One of Brook Berringer's game-worn jerseys (10) Doesn't matter--as long as there's beer... (11) Ken Spaeth (12) F*** the WCO. The Osborne Power I was a perfect college offense. (13) Neither. Byrne was a crook and Pedersen has all the charm of a Rikki Lake stool sample. (14) Herbie. L'il Red belongs on Castro Street with a fist up his butt. (15) Fullback trap or the ol' slot counter (16) These days? Hemlock. (17) Bad luck.

Hey--is it true that they cut off Bevo's testacles? Or am I thinking of Chris Simms?

Whereas the quality of the information on this board is right in line with the price.

I don't know what you'd be thinking. When I get aroused, I have to pull a gun to scare away the lumberjacks and herpetologists.

What was funny about this? Did he walk out on the field wearing a pocket-protector with an amusing saying screen-printed on it? A football jersey with pi in place of a uniform number? I mean, we all know how wacky those chemistry majors can get... Seriously--don't any of you understand what's funny? Or do none of you have lives?

Oh--the man in charge of the student section is going to teach me how to read. Be sure to bring along one your Mom's Barbara Cartland novels.

I pay to sit in West Stadium. I'd prefer not to have someone who is beyond the help of Viagra telling me to "sit down." If they want to watch the game from the comfort of a seated position, they should stay home. They won't have to worry about snagging the hose from their ostomoy bag on their neighbor's formica-and-aluminum chair back. By the way, the wave cheer is as gay as it is outdated. Try focusing on the game and yelling when we need it, instead of seeing who can get the most lemmings to wave their arms up and down. When I become Casear, the wave will be punished by forced intercourse with Courtney Love.

You're right. Forgive and forget. What the heck--it's only tradition. How about we come over to your house, smash your wife's collection of Precious Moments figurines and soil the carpet with excrement. Then maybe we'll set fire to the garage and spray paint gang symbols all over the smoking ruin. When we do, I expect you to say not one word--I will want to hear your plan for fixing the situation and moving forward.

Oh. Well, I guess that makes it okay that Callahan's play-calling led us to a 5-6 season. Hell, if that's the standard, we're off the charts here--I recall T.O. going three-and-out with some poor choices as recently as 1997. Using your logic, I'll just relax--apparently, Callahan is going to win us anational championship this season, huh?

What do you mean to suggest? Are you personally attacking me? I will. You're a troll. Well at least I don't have an avatar that features some guy wearing a twee homo-helmet. Thank you for proving my point. What--I'm a troll because your avatar resembles a majestically-crowned seven-foot phallus? Superman in a pith helmet--a comic-book geek calling ME a troll. That's rich.

Yeah, we've got some talent at this position--of course, we had talented I-backs last year, too, and that didn't stop our genius coach from throwing the ball at the expense of the run... You couldn't have expected more out of Ross. Did you not see the OK game where they had to lift him off the turf? Only one guy can do so much. Yes. I was there--and I loved that herois FG as time expired. I also saw the ISU game when we called 43 pass plays vs. 19 handoffs to Ross and four to Jackson, and ended up with a festival of three-and-outs. We wouldn't have beaten Oklahoma last year even with a perfect game plan. But that hardly excuses some of the mud-headed play-calling we saw last year. It's one thing to miss the toilet when you're drunk. It's another to leave a steaming load of dookie on Mom's pillow.

He should. And if he did, and he could give me a credible explanation of why we throw on first and second and goal from the enemy's two, or why you throw against USM when you have a lead and they can't stop the run, or why you throw the ball 42 times with a 30 mph wind in Ames, Iowa, or why you generally call plays that suck, then maybe I would forgive him. As for his origin, it really doesn't matter. Lousy coaches can come from anywhere.

Yeah. He could replace some of the fossils in West Stadium on game day, since Pinnacle wouldn't have the good sense to hire him. They seem to have an aversion to broadcast talent.

What do you mean to suggest? Are you personally attacking me? I will. You're a troll. Well at least I don't have an avatar that features some guy wearing a twee homo-helmet.

Maybe when we see some evidence that he learns from his mistakes, instead of repeating them, it'll sound like more than the hollow bleating of a failed-bit NFL reject.

What do you mean to suggest? Are you personally attacking me?