Popular Post hack Posted September 2, 2012 Popular Post Share Posted September 2, 2012 [sCENE: Crowded Tom Osborne Field, Memorial Stadium] ESPN REPORTER: Taylor, you were amazing today. So much so, I am actually considering being the mother of your children. MARTINEZ: Uh... you're a dude. REPORTER: Don't mock my dreams, Taylor! You passed for 354 yards with no interceptions. What happened to all of your suck from last year? MARTINEZ: Ha-Ha! I gave my suck to Brett Maher. REPORTER: Ha-Ha! MARTINEZ: No, seriously: he has my suck. All of it. [MAHER PASSES BEHIND MARTINEZ] MAHER: Screw you, Martinez! MARTINEZ: Man-up, Nancy! REPORTER: So... was there anything else you did during the off-season? MARTINEZ: Lots, actually. I worked on my technique with Coach Steve Calhoun, attended the Manning Quarterback Camp... REPORTER: Uh-huh... MARTINEZ: ... and when none of that worked, I sold my soul to the Devil. REPORTER: Right. And... wait, whut..? MARTINEZ: Yeah, Beelzebub offered me a sweet deal with a pro option. REPORTER: ... uh... MARTINEZ: I figured I really wasn't using it, so why not? REPORTER: .... [MARTINEZ'S EYE GLOW RED AND HIS VOICE CHANGES] MARTINEZ: And really, what has your Messiah done for you lately? [COACH RON BROWN WALKS PASS THE INTERVIEW] REPORTER: Coach Brown, did you know about Taylor's pact with the Lord of Darkness? BROWN: Yes, I disapprove of Taylor's contract with the Master of Lies... but little brother was rockin' it like a boss today, tho. 354 yards? Crazy! MARTINEZ: Hail, Satan! BROWN: Yeah, that's not gonna happen. [COACH RON BROWN WALKS AWAY, MARTINEZ SHRUGS] REPORTER: Uh... anything you want to say in closing, Taylor? MARTINEZ: AS FORETOLD BY THE HELL SPAWN SWITZER THE SOONER, THE BLOOD OF THE INNOCENT SHALL FLOW IN THE STREETS AS WATER, THE SKY WILL RAIN BRIMSTONE AND NEBRASKA SHALL BE BIG TEN CHAMPIONS. REPORTER: ... really? MARTINEZ: ... LEGENDS RUNNER-UP, MINIMUM. REPORTER: Thanks, Taylor. Let's send it back to Sport Center..! 10 Quote Link to comment
HuskerfaninOkieland Posted September 2, 2012 Share Posted September 2, 2012 Good to see you back hack! Quote Link to comment
HuskerDens Posted September 2, 2012 Share Posted September 2, 2012 LOLs, That was good for a laugh... Quote Link to comment
Blackshirtsguru Posted September 2, 2012 Share Posted September 2, 2012 Nice one Hack! Quote Link to comment
'SkersRule Posted September 2, 2012 Share Posted September 2, 2012 MARTINEZ: I sold my soul to the Devil....I figured I really wasn't using it Those lines are from the movie, "Oh Brother Where Art Thou." Nicely done. Quote Link to comment
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