Grape Julius

Just can not see any possible way that Mike Riley retains Kaz--I might very well be wrong, but will be shocked if it happens. Those two are just about the very definition of "polar opposites" when it comes to coaching philosophy and how to treat/motivate players.

You need to understand that Frost said before that he would not come back without being the HC. This is more to do with Frost than Riley. I'm not blaming Riley for Frost at all--I only mentioned him as one of the disappointments of an assistant coach staff that is a little bit...nondescript so far. Not "bad", not a "dumpster fire"--just a little underwhelming at this point in the hiring process. That said, if MR can add just one big name recruiter (Orgeron, Orgeron, Orgeron...), I think it'll be fine. For all the faults Banker supposedly had in the eyes of the OSU fans, I can't see how he wouldn't be an upgrade over Papuchis.

So we're getting a lot of Oregon State assistants (which I'm trying to reserve judgment on), not getting Frost, probably not getting Steele or Orgeron...and the one position coach we wanted from OSU may not be coming?

Any truth to the rumor that Banker is not coming as the DC?

Every young boy, throwing and kicking the pigskin around in his back yard, dreams of growing up to one day take the field for the Huskers in the Foster Farms Bowl.

As I was scouring the internet, looking for something to help me feel better about the (rumored, alleged) assistant coaching hires, I found this and thought it was interesting. Really sorry if it's been posted already--I'm sure it probably has at some point, but thought a refresh might not be a bad idea anyway, (given our current circumstances). Some notable names, along with their records against the Top 25: Mark Dantonio: 12-25 Bill Snyder: 23-43 Bret Bielema: 10-20 Jerry Kill: 1-10 Gary Pinkel: 15-37 Kirk Ferentz: 19-34 Gary Anderson: 2-8 Gary Patterson: 14-14 Dan Mullen: 2-21 Kyle Whittingham: 9-13 Paul Johnson: 7-20 Bo Pelini: 9-14 Mike Riley: 13-39 What I take away from that list is that Bo and Mike both performed about the same as other respected coaching names on that list, as did other candidates mentioned on our collective wish list, and that's not such a bad thing. Stats are funny--they can say everything while at the same time indicating nothing, based on the sample size you use. If we changed the list to only include results against the Top 10, the numbers would look even worse for some pretty big names. Saban was 22-23 against the Top 25 at Michigan State and LSU. Spurrier is 18-23 at South Carolina. Les Miles has a good record against the Top 25 now, but at Oklahoma State, he was only 3-12. Meanwhile, Brian Kelly actually had a better record at his previous stops--8-4 at Central Michigan and Cincinnati--than his current 7-7 record at a school with considerably more resources. In fact, the only names that really jumped out on the list for strong, consistent success against the Top 25 at a single program were David Shaw at 14-4 (wow), and Bob Stoops at 50-25. And after last night, more than a few Sooner fans would be more than happy to help Stoops pack his bags for Lincoln, Gainesville, Iowa City, or just about any other one-way travel destination not named Norman, Oklahoma. Honest question: would we have wanted Stoops, based on his past success (like Tressel)? Or was finding the right fit for THIS program ultimately more important? I'm still in "wait and see" mode on the assistants. I will be pretty disappointed if we don't end up with Eddie O (especially when he's publicly expressed interest) or Kevin Steele. But I like Riley and am willing to give him the benefit of the doubt on putting together his own staff, because the truth of the matter is, we can't accurately predict how successful he's going to be here based on his past record, and the same can be said for the rest of his coaching staff.

I, too, am greatly enjoying the collective misery of the Badger fan base.

We can probably go ahead and skip the next 8 or 9 months--I'm ready for the 2015 season to begin right now.

I'm sold. Completely sold. Sold as in "I can't believe what a 180 degree turn I'm making" sold. The guy has always had a well-earned reputation as one of the nicest people in all of sports; I knew this. What I didn't know was just how limited his resources at Corvalis really were. People point to his time with the Chargers--well, his prospects for a successful NFL coaching stint began and ended with Kevin Gilbride gifting him with a 2nd year malcontent QB named Ryan Leaf. I was initially disappointed about not getting Tressel, but I'd take Riley over all of the other credible names mentioned. The very thought of having someone like Bielema (who I don't believe for a second was even offered) leading our Huskers in the tunnel walk next year is enough to make me physically sick. The Vest was one thing, but a skunk like Bielema? Hells no. At the end of the day, we ended up with a very good coach and an even better person. I know that's the company line, but I don't care--in this guy's case, I believe it. I'm behind Coach Riley 100%.

That's a fair point. My initial disappointment was more about the fact that it wasnt Tressel than anything else. Mike Riley has always been known for being a class act and as genuine a nice guy as they come, but I had always also assumed that he was a mediocre game coach. Just from a little afternoon research, I'm blown away by how limited those Corvalis resources really are--had NO idea. Then, when you take a look at Nick Saban's largely mediocre record at Michigan State before he ended up in Alabama... there are some interesting parallels with a good coach moving up to better resources. Big splash hire? No. But if Orgeron (sp?) comes aboard, as has been mentioned, and the right coordinators are hired? Hmm. Sock, you are forgiven. Even so, it may be quite awhile before I can bring myself to place trust in comfortable, sensible footwear again.

At first, I was all like But now, I'm all like

I feel the exact same way. Anything labeled "100% cotton" is now suspect in my book. Cotton, Wool, Nylon, Polyester blends--they are all dead to me. I will walk around in a pair of CROCS before I ever, EVER put those hated things known as "socks" on my person again. AND, I take back my previous praise of Jim Henson. From this day forward, I now prefer Mimes to Puppeteers.

Why do I suddenly feel like Linus waiting for the Great Pumpkin to arrive bearing good tidings and gifts for all those who believeth in him? Reading this post...well, I haven't been this disappointed in a mythical being since I found out that Santa Claus wasn't real. But then again, it is probably wrong of me to even mention that jolly old elf in the same sentence, for our Sock Puppets transcends ALL legendary characters both past and present. Oh glorious Sock Puppet--I still believe in you. Your inherent goodness and majesty would never allow you to intentionally mislead us common folk, and I refuse to believe anyone who says otherwise. Jim Tressel WILL be our next coach, because that is what you have foretold. Of course, if you DO turn out to be wrong, if someone other than Tressel is named...then I will become a broken shell of a fan, forever after filled with bitterness towards my fellow man and a complete mistrust of anything made of cotton. But no pressure or anything.

Scanning the internet today for any potential Jim Tressel sightings or updates, something caught my eye that I'd never noticed before and I did a complete double-take--no idea how I missed it all these years, but it was a grassy knoll moment, to be sure. Needless to say, I am relieved that my faith in the.sock.puppet has not been in vain. I am now confidently looking forward to welcoming Coach Tressel to Lincoln whenever I happen to bump into him at Hy-Vee.

Oh honorable Sock Puppet, I know that you are far too modest to take credit, but I'm going to thank you anyway--I had just about given up hope. Others have already said it, and I agree with them: you are indeed my favorite mythical creature. Legends of your greatness will be told to Husker children far and wide--they shall forever more write their Christmas lists to you, if Tressel is named. Husker men want to BE you, Husker women want to be WITH you, and all that. If your information turns out to be true, I hope that Tressel finds a spot on his coaching staff for you. In fact, if I had any editing skills at all, I would take the liberty of photoshopping you into your rightful place on Jim Tressel's sideline.

He's already my hero. I went to work barefoot today for fear of offending one of his family members.

I agree. I have the same uneasy feeling, and it would likely be worse if there was a hiring committee involved. But in this age of group think, the fact that Eichorst stated unequivocally that HE would be conducting his own search makes me think he's less likely to be influenced by outside opinion than would others. Even so, it's been over 3 hours since the Sock Puppet has posted anything--I was kind of hoping for hourly updates. Looks like my tribute to Jim Henson wasn't enough to appease him.

Sock puppet, you have earned our trust. In the case of conflicting information, do you feel that one source has more credibility than another? Also, I would like to state that, even before you came out with the rarest of gold nuggets (i.e., insider info that actually proved legitimate), I have always regarded the late great Jim Henson with the utmost esteem. Thank you.

Typical Iowa: a hard-fought loss to a better team, and their giddy fans celebrating yet another gutsy moral victory by Ferentz. I really wouldn't have minded seeing Iowa win that one--just can not stand anything at all about Wisconsin. But that's what Husker football has come to: hoping that fricking IOWA can take care of the bully on the block for us. Now if that isn't depressing, I don't know what is.

Well, there's that.

8. Think significant changes are needed, but still believe in the program and an eventual return to national prominence. Oklahoma, Texas, USC, Miami, Alabama, Michigan, Tennessee, LSU, Florida--they've all gone through lows as bad or worse than where we are right now. Just have to hire the right guy.

Pap will fail to make a key or timely adjustment every time the game is on the line Beck isn't Greg Davis bad, but his "jack of all trades, master of none" offensive system is never going to return the program to national prominence. Bo...just extremely disappointed. I was done with him after last week's rinse and repeat blowout loss, and today is just confirmation that a change is needed. A loss to Minnesota. At Memorial. On Senior Day. Disgusting.

To become an Iowa fan, you've got to set your expectations at 7 wins a year and your coach being a super nice guy. Things are bad here, but I don't know if they're quite THAT bad. Slippery slope, though. Really, really tired of performances like last week and today.