NUpolo8 Posted June 10, 2007 Share Posted June 10, 2007 There is no speed of light, onl;y the Speed where Matt Slauson decided to stop racing the sun because Matt Slauson hates to sweat Quote Link to comment
Husker_x Posted June 10, 2007 Share Posted June 10, 2007 Matt Slauson can break a sweat...literally. When Matt Slauson seizes the day, we experience a thing called sunset. If you play Monopoly with Matt Slauson, you do not pass Go, you do not collect two hundred dollars. You're lucky to make it out alive. If you play the boardgame Life with Matt Slauson, you'd be better off just calling it Death. The last time they put Matt Slauson in to block, it caused the dust bowl. The nice thing about the O-line starting stance is that Slauson will already have dug at least one grave each time the ball is snapped. Quote Link to comment
ttheKid1*18 Posted June 10, 2007 Share Posted June 10, 2007 My personal favorite... "When Matt Slauson jumps in a pool, he doesn't get wet, the water gets Matt Slauson." Quote Link to comment
TheCropDuster Posted June 11, 2007 Author Share Posted June 11, 2007 Jesus can walk on water, but Matt Slauson can walk on Jesus. Matt Slauson drinks napalm to quell his heartburn. In a tagteam match, Matt Slauson was teamed with Hulk Hogan against King Kong Bundy and Andre The Giant. He pinned all 3 at the same time. Quote Link to comment
husker rob Posted June 11, 2007 Share Posted June 11, 2007 Matt Slausen is not hung like a horse, Horses are hung like Matt Slausen Quote Link to comment
TheCropDuster Posted June 11, 2007 Author Share Posted June 11, 2007 When Matt Slauson goes to out to eat, he orders a whole chicken, but he only eats its soul. Quote Link to comment
cmb23 Posted June 11, 2007 Share Posted June 11, 2007 When the going gets tough...the tough gets Matt Slauson When Matt Slauson attends a rodeo...the bulls ride Matt Slauson Matt Slauson does not dance...the ground moves for Matt Slauson Matt Slauson has no tattoos...there are no needles strong enough to pierce the skin of Matt Slauson Matt Slauson does not lift weights...the weights jump off of Matt Slauson When Matt Slauson takes a dump...he wipes with 30-grit sandpaper When Matt Slauson saw Nightmare on Elm Street...Freddy had nightmares of Matt Slauson Quote Link to comment
TheCropDuster Posted June 11, 2007 Author Share Posted June 11, 2007 When Matt Slauson takes a dump...he wipes with 30-grit sandpaper Quote Link to comment
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