United States of Scary Things

[AllTheGoodNamesAreTaken]

found this on the interwebz. i guess its supposed to represent a scary thing each state is known for. thought it was pretty funny.

 

linkidy dinkity do

[La Volpe]

Haha, that's pretty good. Seems like they copped out on anything "zombie...", but kinda funny none the less.

[TheCheshireCat]

Charles Starkweather would have been a good one

[Hammerhead]

I'd be more scared of our running backs.

[ADS]

Washington-Hipsters

[darkhorse85]

New Jersey may be the most frightening of all.

 

aspeedlin4589 - check that state again, bud.

[papersun87]

aspeedlin4589 - check that state again, bud.

Q: How do you know if someone is from Portland?

 

A: Don't worry, they'll tell you.

[jsneb83]

New Jersey may be the most frightening of all.

 

aspeedlin4589 - check that state again, bud.

Somebody didn't pass geography in high school.

[darkhorse85]

aspeedlin4589 - check that state again, bud.

Q: How do you know if someone is from Portland?

 

A: Don't worry, they'll tell you.

 

Same with vegans at a dinner party.

[RussianHuskerKCMO]

You might be from Nebraska if...

You've never met any celebrities

Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor on the

highway

"Vacation" means driving to the Henry Doorly Zoo or going to the State

Fair.

You've seen all the biggest bands ten years after they were popular.

You measure distance in minutes

Down south to you means Kansas

You know several people who have hit a deer

You have no problem spelling or pronouncing "Kearney" and "Beatrice"

Your school classes were canceled because of cold

Your school classes were canceled because of heat

You know what Huskers are

You've ridden the school bus for an hour each way

You've ever had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day

You think ethanol makes your truck "run a lot better."

You know what "knee high by the Fourth of July" refers to

Getting paid minimum wage is considered a raise.

Stores don't have bags, they have sacks

You end your sentences with an unnecessary preposition. Example:

"Where's my coat at?" or "If you go to the mall I wanna go with."

You can locate Nebraska on the United States map

Your idea of a really great Burger is when the meat is twice as big as

the bun and accompanied only by ketchup and a dill pickle slice

You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both

unlocked

When asked how your trip was to any foreign, exotic place, you say, "It

was different."

You carry jumper cables in your car

You drink "pop."

You know what the numbers I-80, 275 and 2 mean

You know what a "Runza" is.

You know what the electrical cord hanging out of the front of a car is

for.

You can name everyone you graduated with.

You ever went to parties at a pasture, barn or in the middle of a dirt

road.

You used to drag "Main"

You said the "f" word and your parents knew within the hour.

You schedule parties around the schedule of different police officers

Same goes with the game warden.

You ever went cow-tipping or snipe hunting.

Schools gets canceled for state sporting events.

It was cool to date someone from the neighboring town.

You don't give directions by street names or house numbers, but you

give directions by references (turn by Clevenger's house, go two blocks

past Smiths and it's four houses left of the football field, or turn on

the street that Arlene's is on, go to the post office and stop at the

house in the middle of the block, just past Engels).

The town next to you is considered "trashy" or "snooty", but is

actually just like your town.

You see at least one friend a week driving a tractor through town.

Football coaches suggest that you bale hay for the summer to get

stronger.

Directions are given using the town library as a reference.

The City Council meets at the coffee shop.

You decide to walk somewhere for exercise and five people pull over and

ask if you need a ride.

 

It is normal to see an old man riding through town on a riding lawn

mower or golf cart.

When someone gets pulled over, the whole town drives by at least twice.

Everyone else hears it on their scanners.

Almost everyone in your school also has a cousin in your school.

Loitering isn't a bad thing, it's the only thing.

[ADS]

New Jersey may be the most frightening of all.

 

aspeedlin4589 - check that state again, bud.

Somebody didn't pass geography in high school.

Haha dumbest thing I have ever posted.