Interesting Read. Found this on This Ain't Intramurals

[HighPlainsDrifter]

The Big 12 coaches are an interesting bunch. I think it would be a blast to sit down with each coach and have a few drinks, get to know his real personality, and hear some great stories. That leads me to the point of this post. If you were to sit down with each coach in the Big 12 what do you think his drink of choice would be? Beav and I have decided to debate this topic. We hope you enjoy. Feel free to make your selections in the comments at the end of the post.

 

First up...

 

Art Briles

 

Steve: The man comes across as old school and about as Texan as they come. The old school side of Briles screams beer all the way. The guy has spent his entire life playing football and coaching football in the state of Texas, so it has to be a Texas beer. My pick: Lonestar

 

Beav: Looks like we are pretty close on this one, but I determined that his Texas-ness would make him a fan of another Texas classic. My pick: Shiner Bock

 

Bill Snyder

 

Steve: Definitely doesn't come across as a beer drinker. He's too much of a hardass. Snyder burns the midnight oil researching and planning everything he does. When it comes to drinking, he wants something that tastes smooth, but has a lot of alcohol. It's all about efficiency with Snyder. What takes only a few drinks to pack an alcohol punch, and contains few impurities so he's not hungover? My pick: Grey Goose Martini

 

Beav: Its a proven fact that Vodka + Mountain Dew is the best way to get down in Manhattan, but that's not Snyder's style. If the players can't get butter at a team dinner, you know Snyder isn't going to pussify his spirits with ice, sugar, and yellow dye #5. Bill's a no nonsense guy and notoriously cheap, which is why he just goes with...My pick: Popov - neat

 

Bo Pelini

 

Steve: There are only two types of people who wear sweatshirts as often as Pelini: The Bill Belichik type and sorority girls making the walk of shame. Pelini is obviously more Belichickian than sorority girl. Pelini also seems to have little patience to wait for a bar tender to mix a frothy cocktail. A no-nonsense drink is a must for this guy. My pick: Jack Daniels, straight from a shot glass

 

Beav: Even though Bo isn't from Nebraska, Husker fans embraced him as one of their own from the beginning. Nebraskans say things like “Bo gets it” and “Bo’s a Nebraska guy.” What does a “Nebraska Guy” drink? Red beer. My pick: Tomato Juice and Coors Light

 

Bob Stoops

 

Steve: Bob use to seem like a ballsy, go get'em type of a coach when he took over at Oklahoma. Now he seems a little more uptight. I guess losing in every BCS bowl game will do that to a man, even if you are one of the best coaches in the country. Stoops needs something that goes well with the pine tree that seems to be stuck up his ass the last few years, but still fancy enough for a multi-millionaire. My pick: Bombay Sapphire Gin and Tonic

 

Beav: Stoops spent time as an assistant to coaching legends Bill Snyder and Steve Spurrier. His drink, like his coaching style, combines the flamboyance of the Ol' Ball Coach with the steady fortitude of Snyder. My pick: Bourbon Street Hurricane

 

 

Dan Hawkins

 

Steve: Hawkins is a little bit of a goofball. A good fit for Boulder because he is an outdoorsy type of guy. If there was a mixed drink made with blended up trail mix, Hawkins would be all over it. As far as I know there is no such thing as Trail Mix and Vodka, so he needs something you can get plenty of in Colorado. A good locally made microbrew. But, I doubt Hawkins is man enough for a good Pale Ale or Stout. My pick: Raspberry Wheat Beer

 

Beav: Boulderians don't get their buzz out of a bottle. There's a reason Buff practices always wrap up by 4:20. My Pick: Fatty

 

 

Gary Pinkel

 

Steve: Pinkel is a tough one to read. He always comes across as boring and a little self-defensive. My guess is Gary was picked on a lot when he was in high school and college--not because he is a loser or dumb. He obviously has a few brains and has had some success along the years. So why is he so defensive? Got it! People make fun of him for drinking "girly" drinks. My pick: Sex on the Beach

 

Beav: Gary Pinkel is a crappy coach who has enjoyed modest success despite bringing nothing to the table except an ability to amass enough talent around him to distract from his worthlessness. Kind of like those dudes on www.hotchickswithdouchebags.com. Not so coincidentally, his drink of choice is the same as theirs. My pick: Jägerbomb

 

 

Mack Brown

 

Steve: I was almost tricked into picking the wrong drink for Mack. I originally had Mack pegged for a red wine guy. Then I started thinking about it. He's a little to slick for red wine. Yet he still needs something refined and expensive. That can only leave one option for Mack. My pick: Johnnie Walker Blue, neat

 

Beav: I'm pretty sure that deep down, Mack is country. I bet he still loves the cheap Bourbon that he used to nip off the flask at high school dances. Mack does likes to give the aura of a southern sophisticate - which is why I bet he keeps the Bourbon in a crystal decanter in his office. He wants you to think he's got that Johnnie Walker, but he wants to taste something a little more uncouth. My Pick: Wild Turkey

 

Mark Mangino

 

Steve: Mangino is often the target of fat jokes. It's too obvious to go with some cream-filled (insert porn joke of choice here) type of drink. I picture Mangino pulling into a Macaroni Grill, eating 6 servings of the free bread and two plates of chicken parmesean, and washing the whole thing down with...My pick: Macaroni Grill House Red Wine.

 

Beav: Yes, the Mangino fat jokes are easy...but look at the guy - he's just so goddamn fat. I think Mangino's drink of choice would be one of those dessert drinks that contain more cake than Kahlua. He'd have to eat several to cop a buzz, but I'm sure Mangino would be up for it. My pick: A Mangino Mudslide, made specially for him.

 

 

Mike Gundy

 

Steve: This was the easiest one. Gundy still thinks he could go to the college bars and pick up chicks. Not only could I pick Gundy's drink, I bet you I can nail his outfit too: Designer jeans, designer shoes, and a tight fitting designer shirt that is half-way unbuttoned with the sleeves rolled up. He would stroll into the bar, unsuccessfully hit on a 21 year old, then make his way to the bar and order...My pick: Red Bull and Vodka

 

Beav: Gundy may have screamed "I'm a man...", but the spiky hair, fake tan, and visor make him look more like a guy who would scream "Body Shots!". My Pick: Shots of Patron....preferably out of Jenni Carlson's extra deep bellybutton

 

 

Mike Leach

 

Steve: There is no way Mike Leach drinks something your average guy does. Leach is off the wall and has to drink something a little different. Yet, he is a closet snob, so the drink has to be a fine one. A lot of people might lean toward Captain Morgan for Leach because of his obsession with pirates. Not me. My pick: Cognac

 

Beav: Leach does love the pirates, and while conventional thinking says pirate lover=Captain Morgan drinker, conventional thinking isn’t always right. A couple of barrels of rum wouldn’t have ever lasted long for an entire ship full of pirates…which is why pirates mastered the art of distilling alcohol out of anything they could: bread crumbs, fruit rinds, or seaweed, - to make a kelpier version of good ol’ prison wine. Leach may not necessarily be a football purist, but I guarantee he’s a pirate purist. My pick: Pruno

 

Mike Sherman

 

Steve: Sherman spent a butt-load of his coaching career in Green Bay and he can't stop telling people about it. "One time Brett Farve and I found all these pains killers, so..." They don't make a cheese flavored beer (at least none that I am aware of), and Sherman doesn't really strike me as a Miller or Old Milwaukee type of guy. But, he still has to drink something that reminds him of his past glory in Green Bay. My pick: Leinenkugel's Original

 

Beav: As a former NFL head coach & GM, Sherman probably sees his current job at the bottom of the Big XII a bit beneath him. I peg Sherman as a wine connoisseur - the type of guy who needs to assert his superiority through a vast wine collection - just to reminding everyone that he's already 'made it'. A guy who sticks his whole nose into his Riesling glass and tells you about its goût petrol. My pick: Anything that looks nice swirling in a Bordeaux glass.

 

 

 

Paul Rhoads

 

Steve: Rhoads may have spent the last few seasons as the Defensive Coordinator at Auburn, but he is an Iowa guy. As a current Iowa resident, I know Iowans are fond of their booze, especially the wonderful Templeton Rye Whiskey. Unfortunately, people like the Templeton a little too much and there isn't enough to go around, so Rhoads has to drink something else until supply catches up to demand. What better drink to ease the pain of a first year coach than...My pick: Homemade Iowa Corn Whiskey

 

Beav: I’ll be honest, I don’t know a damn thing about this guy except that he appears to be satisfied picking up what Gene Chizik leaves behind. My Pick: The last swig from Chizik’s discarded bottle of Bud Light

[knapplc]

That right there is some funny stuff.

[jjamuss]

Dan Hawkins

 

Steve: Hawkins is a little bit of a goofball. A good fit for Boulder because he is an outdoorsy type of guy. If there was a mixed drink made with blended up trail mix, Hawkins would be all over it. As far as I know there is no such thing as Trail Mix and Vodka, so he needs something you can get plenty of in Colorado. A good locally made microbrew. But, I doubt Hawkins is man enough for a good Pale Ale or Stout. My pick: Raspberry Wheat Beer

 

Beav: Boulderians don't get their buzz out of a bottle. There's a reason Buff practices always wrap up by 4:20. My Pick: Fatty

 

 

That is the funniest one on here!!

[NUance]

Beav: I’ll be honest, I don’t know a damn thing about this guy except that he appears to be satisfied picking up what Gene Chizik leaves behind. My Pick: The last swig from Chizik’s discarded bottle of Bud Light

 

Funny, FUNNY, stuff!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

At first I wondered how this related to NU football. Then I thought. Drinking. Football. Mentions Pelini. Okay, close enough.

[Husker Richard]

Mangino Mudslides, hilarious.

[Eric the Red]

That's freakin great

[HighPlainsDrifter]

I would have made Bo's drink of choice, a good ol' Pabst Blue Ribbon beer. Nothing like a PBR.

[topekahusker]

I would think Bill Snyder would drink a Manhattan - duh.....