papersun87 Posted June 19, 2014 Share Posted June 19, 2014 Let the inaugural summit of the Official Huskerboard Committee to Claim Championships come to order. Ladies and gentlemen of the Committee: since the dawn of college football the term "national title" has been nebulous at best. Even our august governing body, the En See Double Eh, does not recognize a proper national champion at the FBS level, but rather, a "BCS" champion. Attempts have been made in recent years to clarify the criteria of the aforementioned, but even as college football enters the "playoff era," the qualifications for a national title will still be determined at least in part by Tyrone Willingham. Therefore we should not find ourselves surprised to discover that rogue southern schools Auburn and Texas A&M are claiming past national and conference titles! The Aggies have the audacity to claim the 1997 Big XII title, when they were soundly beaten in the title game by our own Nebraska Cornhuskers, as well as the 2010 Big XII title, when they failed to even make the title game. Auburn is claiming an extra three national championships: 1913, 1983, and 1993, when the Tigers were banned from postseason play. WAR EAGLE! Ladies and gentlemen of the committee, at this time it is plain what we must do: Claim like ten titles of our own! Therefore the chair moves to claim the following national titles: 1980: Nebraska went 10-2 with an 18-14 loss to #16 Florida State and a 21-17 loss to #9 Oklahoma. Nebraska rebounded with a 31-17 victory over #17 Mississippi State in the Sun Bowl and finished #7 in both polls. Why should we claim it? Because some guy called Rothman says we should. CLAIM IT! 1981: Nebraska went 9-3 with losses to Iowa, #3 Penn State, and #1 Clemson to finish #9 in the Coaches' Poll and #11 in the AP. Why should we claim it? Just look at those losses. Iowa: not a real school, doesn't count. Penn State: ref home-cookin', doesn't count. Clemson: I'm colorblind and can't see orange, so doesn't count. Plus, look at those quality wins! 6-0 over Missouri! CLAIM IT! 1982: Nebraska went 12-1 with a loss to Penn St . . . oh wait, maybe this was the year with the ref home-cookin'. Whatever. CLAIM IT AND STILL CLAIM 1981 ANYWAY. 1983: We only technically lost that Orange Bowl because we have the coach with the BRASSIEST BALLS EVER. CLAIM IT. 1984: Not sure what the "Litkenhous" rankings are but whatever, it sounds German. Who know who else was German? ALBERT EINSTEIN and he was pretty smart. CLAIM IT. 1993: The Committee has ruled that Nebraska's touchdowns count as eight points instead of six, meaning we won that game. CLAIM IT. 1995: We already won one national title this year, but c'mon, best college football team EVER, RIGHT? We all know full well this team was so awesome it would've beaten every other team in NCAA football COMBINED. CLAIM IT. AGAIN. 1996: That Arizona State game had such a late start my parents wouldn't let me stay up to watch it, so NEVER HAPPENED. And that bit with Texas? Well, their quarterback was a 63-year-old soul singer who I SEVERELY doubt had any eligibility left. Someday soon the NCAA will rule force Texas to vacate that Big XII title game but until then CLAIM IT. 2007: Best team in Nebraska history. A few minor hiccups along the way don't change nothing. CLAIM IT. The chair opens the floor to the Committee. 4 Quote Link to comment
knapplc Posted June 19, 2014 Share Posted June 19, 2014 This is a lot of work to poke some fun at the Aggies. I like it! Quote Link to comment
Redux Posted June 19, 2014 Share Posted June 19, 2014 We should claim 2009 because Mike Leach got fired so the loss to TTU doesnt count. 92 turnovers or so vs Iowa State are obvious treachery by refs, doesnt count. VaTeach slowed clock down to half speed in fourth quarter so the last few minutes need to be erased, doesnt count. And of course we all know that loss to Texas was bs, doesnt count. 2009 National Champs! Quote Link to comment
deedsker Posted June 19, 2014 Share Posted June 19, 2014 I was on the floor laughing before I got through all that. Claim it! Quote Link to comment
Scratchtown Posted June 19, 2014 Share Posted June 19, 2014 I was on the floor laughing before I got through all that. Claim it! Thats impressive. I didn't think anyone actually did the "rofl". Musta been a hoot. Quote Link to comment
deedsker Posted June 19, 2014 Share Posted June 19, 2014 I was on the floor laughing before I got through all that. Claim it! Thats impressive. I didn't think anyone actually did the "rofl". Musta been a hoot. Did you not read that hilarity? Quote Link to comment
Scratchtown Posted June 19, 2014 Share Posted June 19, 2014 I was on the floor laughing before I got through all that. Claim it!Thats impressive. I didn't think anyone actually did the "rofl". Musta been a hoot. Did you not read that hilarity? I read it. But I only smiled. maybe giggled a couple times. Quote Link to comment
papersun87 Posted June 19, 2014 Author Share Posted June 19, 2014 We should claim 2009 because Mike Leach got fired so the loss to TTU doesnt count. 92 turnovers or so vs Iowa State are obvious treachery by refs, doesnt count. VaTeach slowed clock down to half speed in fourth quarter so the last few minutes need to be erased, doesnt count. And of course we all know that loss to Texas was bs, doesnt count. 2009 National Champs! The chair recognizes the 2009 national title. Plus that Bama team was overrated. 1 Quote Link to comment
Redux Posted June 19, 2014 Share Posted June 19, 2014 We should claim 2009 because Mike Leach got fired so the loss to TTU doesnt count. 92 turnovers or so vs Iowa State are obvious treachery by refs, doesnt count. VaTeach slowed clock down to half speed in fourth quarter so the last few minutes need to be erased, doesnt count. And of course we all know that loss to Texas was bs, doesnt count. 2009 National Champs! The chair recognizes the 2009 national title. Plus that Bama team was overrated. Plus, we basically beat Texas, and they had to injure Colt Mccoy to beat Texas. So basically we beat Bama. Quote Link to comment
NUpolo8 Posted June 19, 2014 Share Posted June 19, 2014 We were also conference champs in 2009. Of the Sun Belt. 1 Quote Link to comment
Redux Posted June 19, 2014 Share Posted June 19, 2014 We were also conference champs in 2009. Of the Sun Belt. Hells yes! Quote Link to comment
Abdullah the Butcher Posted June 19, 2014 Share Posted June 19, 2014 Maintain my position that we should claim 1913 through 1915, we had a 34 game unbeaten streak during that period. 1 Quote Link to comment
Redux Posted June 20, 2014 Share Posted June 20, 2014 Maintain my position that we should claim 1913 through 1915, we had a 34 game unbeaten streak during that period. Claim it! Quote Link to comment
The Dude Posted June 20, 2014 Share Posted June 20, 2014 1902. Perfect 10-0. Pitched a shutout on the season. Plus, we really gave Doane the business. 1 Quote Link to comment
Redux Posted June 20, 2014 Share Posted June 20, 2014 1902. Perfect 10-0. Pitched a shutout on the season. Plus, we really gave Doane the business. Its always been my belief Doane was underrated in '02.....Claim it! Quote Link to comment
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