An Incredible Offer From Cy!

[Cy the Cyclone]

I have here in my nicotine stained fingers 4…count em…4 tickets to the Nebraska – Iowa State football game for Saturday, October 18th and these tickets could be yours IF THE PRICE IS RIGHT!

 

These aren’t just your crappy old student tickets people. These are the kind of tickets that vendors give to only their most respected and esteemed clients. The kind of customer who has access to huge amounts of cash to spend with their company….or the kind of customer who would go out for a few drinks with the kind of odd looking yet strangely appealing Account Exec one night and finds himself trying desperately to pull his arm out from under her without waking her up the next morning….you make the call....

 

All beside the point! The fact is that these fine seats, located all together in the lower section of Jack Trice around the 20-30 yard line, can be yours IF you have something to offer that would be interesting or amusing to Cy. Folks…I’ve been told that these seats are within easy throwing distance of the ISU bench and that even women can manage to hit the players with a battery or snowball from them…that’s how close you will be to the action!

 

Cy, being rich and handsome beyond belief, has no need for money…I cannot be swayed by mere coins or cash. Cy would rather give his tickets to someone who takes the time to make an imaginative or creative offer as opposed to some kid who just plunks down some cash. If you want these tickets…make me a cool offer (of course…if all else fails, I will take the cash and I’ll just spend it quick before the ex-wife finds out about it and sends her pet lawyer after it).

 

As an added bonus, along with these tickets you will receive a Super Special Parking Pass that allows you to park your vehicle in the Super Special Parking Lot right next to the stadium…instead of taking a walking tour of lovely Ames, Iowa along with 60,000 obnoxious fans who had to park up to five miles away (at a hyper-inflated price) you will be parking just steps away from both the main gate and the tail gate area! This great parking pass will be my gift to you for making the winning offer!

 

So there’s the deal. The offer that appeals the most to Cy as determined by Cy will be awarded with four tickets to the game along with the parking pass. And please folks…don’t offer me your wives or girlfriends or sister for the weekend or stuff like that as Cy has enough trouble as it is…UNLESS they have some extraordinary unique talent that can’t be found in most women (like they can cook or clean or something….) and anything that would put Cy into jail is strictly verboten…

 

I will entertain your offers beginning….after lunch.

[husker B-rent]

i am willing to give you 100 wings from WestCyde wings, you make the choice on the wings! great for a party. or great for watching games or even tailgating.

 

i found a penny heads up, im feeling lucky.

[HuskerBCS]

Ill give ya a high five! And if I win the tickets you'll probably have to give me money for gas to travel to Ames because I could really care less about seeing this game.

[Apathy]

I actually want to go to Ames again this year because for the past two times Nebraska played in Ames (04 & 06) I was there tailgating with some other ISU fans. I'm currently looking for some tickets on E-bay and have found two that I'm interested in and will be watching those for the time being. BUT if you award me these four tickets, I'll be gladly to wear an ISU Jersey with a Nebraska hat (like I said the last two times i was in Ames I partied with ISU fans and slept at their place)......does that sound good????

[808Husker in KCMO]

I'll give you a framed certificate hailing my Honorable Discharge from the US army along with seven (7) thirty round magazines for use in AR-15 assault rifle. These magazines were used during my 2004 raid on the Akkadian/Assyrian/Babylonian/Abbasid/Achaemenid/Macedonian/Parthian/Sassanid/Umayyad/Mongol/Ottoman/British Empire.

[cmb23]

I will give you the pride and honor of knowing that if I received these tickets that I would be taking my 7 year-old son (along with my wife and father) to his FIRST EVER college football game. Yes...His FIRST live sight of the Huskers @ his FIRST visit to Jack Trice Stadium. You will also be giving us the reason to travel with our friends who are planning on going...and my friend is planning on proposing to his girlfriend at the game...and he wants us to be there.

 

Imagine the great feeling you will have knowing that you allowed a little boy to see the "Big Red" for the first time in real life and knowing that you allowed us to be a part of one of the most prized moments in a loving couple's life when they get engaged.

 

Other than that...I have a bag of carmel popcorn in my desk you can have.

[Apathy]

I will give you the pride and honor of knowing that if I received these tickets that I would be taking my 7 year-old son (along with my wife and father) to his FIRST EVER college football game. Yes...His FIRST live sight of the Huskers @ his FIRST visit to Jack Trice Stadium. You will also be giving us the reason to travel with our friends who are planning on going...and my friend is planning on proposing to his girlfriend at the game...and he wants us to be there.

 

Imagine the great feeling you will have knowing that you allowed a little boy to see the "Big Red" for the first time in real life and knowing that you allowed us to be a part of one of the most prized moments in a loving couple's life when they get engaged.

 

Other than that...I have a bag of carmel popcorn in my desk you can have.

 

Damn you can't beat that post. I think we found ourselves a winner. Well I feel better now I don't have to wear an ISU jersey

[Pedro Guerrero]

Here’s my offer:

 

I will give you my username and password thus allowing you to take control of anything that I (meaning you) would say on this board. I would also award you all of my prestige’s Huskerboard bucks (Do we still have those?) and I will no longer post on this board. I will also throw in the generous gift of all the piles and piles of 2 year old Saint Bernard crap that is in my side yard (I think that is equal to watching ISU play). Further more I will throw in an evening with my overweight, toothless, bald, short bus riding step-sister. She is a real catch and since I noticed you said Ex-Wife I figured you may be looking. Here is the final piece to this winning offer; I will throw in a year supply of MY BELLY BUTTON lent. This is a delicacy in most Thrid World countries and as the years have gone by my button has increased in size thus creating endless amounts of lent.

 

Well that is all I can offer and I really look forward to seeing you in Ames. You bring the tickets and I’ll bring the lent, the crap and my Sloth of a Step Sister.

 

I look forward to meeting you brother (can I be a groomsman?).

[Lyons in the Sea of Red.]

Here’s my offer:

 

I will give you my username and password thus allowing you to take control of anything that I (meaning you) would say on this board. I would also award you all of my prestige’s Huskerboard bucks (Do we still have those?) and I will no longer post on this board. I will also throw in the generous gift of all the piles and piles of 2 year old Saint Bernard crap that is in my side yard (I think that is equal to watching ISU play). Further more I will throw in an evening with my overweight, toothless, bald, short bus riding step-sister. She is a real catch and since I noticed you said Ex-Wife I figured you may be looking. Here is the final piece to this winning offer; I will throw in a year supply of MY BELLY BUTTON lent. This is a delicacy in most Thrid World countries and as the years have gone by my button has increased in size thus creating endless amounts of lent.

 

Well that is all I can offer and I really look forward to seeing you in Ames. You bring the tickets and I’ll bring the lent, the crap and my Sloth of a Step Sister.

 

I look forward to meeting you brother (can I be a groomsman?).

 

haha. that is great.

[Cy the Cyclone]

I will give you the pride and honor of knowing that if I received these tickets that I would be taking my 7 year-old son (along with my wife and father) to his FIRST EVER college football game. Yes...His FIRST live sight of the Huskers @ his FIRST visit to Jack Trice Stadium. You will also be giving us the reason to travel with our friends who are planning on going...and my friend is planning on proposing to his girlfriend at the game...and he wants us to be there.

 

Imagine the great feeling you will have knowing that you allowed a little boy to see the "Big Red" for the first time in real life and knowing that you allowed us to be a part of one of the most prized moments in a loving couple's life when they get engaged.

 

Other than that...I have a bag of carmel popcorn in my desk you can have.

 

Great...if I turn this one down I'm gonna look like a total jerk....

 

Fine...PM me where you are and I'll get the tickets to you. Give the carmel corn to your kid...

 

Geez...I was hoping to at least get a hat.... Oh wait! Hey you MU and KU fans...what'll you give me to sleep with the odd-looking account exec again to get some tickets for your games? Good stuff! Uh...the tickets, not the sex...

[billdozer15]

I am willing to give you 1, thats right 1 soul. Billdozer15's soul could be yours to do with as you wish. Most people only have 1 soul, but you could have two. Now that is bragging rights.

[Pedro Guerrero]

Man I'm totally crushed and I really don't want to break the news to my step-sister. She already bought a dress and everything. Does anyone know anybody that needs a Size Fat Wedding Dress? I guess you can have for your tailgate tent if you want.

 

 

Can I change mine to say that I'm going to bring my 5 year old and 2 year old to their first Husker game? Or that I will bring my 7 year old to her 2nd? I was also going to bring the homeless family that lives in the alley behind my house adn some puppies that I rescued from a puppy mill.

 

 

I really thought I was going to get a new brother out of this.

[Cy the Cyclone]

yeah...you're right. I don't want to be played a fool here by some fast talking guy....that's happened before and my ass STILL hurts....

 

The tickets go to cmb23 IF he can produce a picture of the friend's girlfriend so that she can be judged worthy of the game tickets by the dwellers of Husker Boardopolis...

 

...or gets me a Nebraska hat....

[CENTEXHUSKER]

Man I'm totally crushed and I really don't want to break the news to my step-sister. She already bought a dress and everything. Does anyone know anybody that needs a Size Fat Wedding Dress? I guess you can have for your tailgate tent if you want.

 

 

Dude, stop. I cannot stop laughing, seriously, "Size Fat"

 

[cmb23]

I appreciate your generosity. And I will gladly accept the tickets on behalf of my family and friends. However, I cannot post a photo of my friends soon-to-be fiance:

 

1) I don't want anyone photoshopping her face/body onto a nude celebrity/porographic/inapproriate image as she is a very kind and great person.

 

2) If she, or a co-worker, or a friend happen upon this site and read through this thread, then I, cmb23, will be held responsible for ruining one of the most exciting moments in a first-time-brides life.

 

I will however, admit and tell you that she is very attractive, about 5'8", 110 lb and a personal trainer.

 

OK - I'm really confused....is this all for real or are we all just having a little fun with this?