Favorite funeral stories

[huKSer]

Sometimes amid the sadness there are interesting stories that come out. Well, at least in my family.

 

1) At my half-brother's funeral we knew of ex-wives #1-5. But ex-wife #6 surprised us.

 

2) At my wife's grandfather's funeral reception somebody said loudly "Where's Bubba's side of the family?" Immediately EVERY relative jumped into their cars and sped to grampa's apartment. As we drove up Bubba and his son were loading up grampa's sofa onto their pick up.

 

 

I have more.

[Comish]

At my wife's grandmother's funeral, i was assigned to be a pallbearer and we had to carry the casket UP a hill, dodging gravesites to the top of the cemetery through about 8 inches of snow..........

 

AND, the guy they assigned opposite me was about 100 years old AND had only one arm.

 

So naturally, they gave him the side to walk on where he was ....eh ...............shall we say... involved in disarmament.

 

That was one crooked carry up and through the conditions at a temp of about 5 degrees below.

[JJ Husker]

I can't remember if it was my fathers funeral or my father-in-laws but the volunteer color guard (or whatever you call it) was not very sharp. One of the two guys who folded the flag didn't know how to do it. Yep, it was the guy who was actually folding the triangles. The other was trying to direct him how to do it silently by nodding and tossing his head back and forth. There were more than a few wide eyed looks and snickers in the crowd. Both the guys were in uniform....?

[ShawnWatson]

I was at my grandpa's funeral whom was a war veteran so there was a rifle salute. When they shot the guns my nephew asked (yelled) "are theyshooting him?"

[StPaulHusker]

I was driving an Chevy Tahoe owned by the funeral home with all of my cousins as pall bearers riding inside for my grandmother's funeral. We were following the hearse to the burial site when the cousin in the front passenger seat looked to me and said, "Lets put this fu&*#r in 4 low and see what it can do."

 

That was the last time I spoke to him in over a decade.

[The Dude]

My uncle sang at his own funeral.

[commando]

at my mother in laws funeral i was a pallbearer and we had to walk uphill quite a way in the snow. 1 of the funeral directors was holding onto the front of the casket while backing up the hill to guide us. he slipped and fell backwards...then slid downhill under the casket and into the group of people following us up the hill. all us pallbearers just stopped and looked at each other for a minute...none of us knew what the appropriate thing to do was. do we stop and wait for him to get back up there? do we keep going since we know where the grave is? but we all knew that we should not start laughing no matter how tough it was not to.

 

not so much funny....but way to cute IMO.....at my brothers funeral his niece from his wifes side of the family asked her dad for a dollar. when he gave her the dollar she went up to the casket and put it on his chest and said "here you go Arlin...go buy something fun in heaven". he would always give her a dollar when they went to the local cafe so she could go get something from the vending machines so that was her way of saying good bye to him..

[ShawnWatson]

My uncle sang at his own funeral.

 

Oh details!

[huKSer]

My siblings knew my brother was gay, but he kept it from our mother. At his funeral he requested "Dancing Queen" to be played. We think our mother never figured it out.

[The Dude]

My uncle sang at his own funeral.

 

Oh details!

Apparently his family found some old tapes of him singing some songs, I think they were original songs of his, and thought it would be neat to play one at the funeral. It turned out to be more eery than anything. I heard the song play not knowing it was him initially, but thought "that sounds like uncle Bob". Then it dawned on me. It was uncle Bob. Only guy I ever knew who sang at his own funeral.

[Ulty]

My wife's grandparents and an assortment of aunts, uncles, and cousins live in southern Missouri and are hardcore Mizzou fans who love talking $h!t to the northern part of the family, mostly Husker fans. The grandfather was a verbally abusive and cold-hearted SOB, but everyone still loved and respected him out of some sort of patriarchal obligation. His funeral ended up being on the same day as the final Nebraska/Missouri game in 2010 when Helu ran wild. In fact the game started as soon as everyone got back from the funeral.

 

I kind of feel like a jerk for it, but not really...between attending that funeral with the Mizzou side of the family and watching the game with them, not a single word was spoken, and I considered it to be a pretty good day!

[ShawnWatson]

My uncle sang at his own funeral.

 

Oh details!

Apparently his family found some old tapes of him singing some songs, I think they were original songs of his, and thought it would be neat to play one at the funeral. It turned out to be more eery than anything. I heard the song play not knowing it was him initially, but thought "that sounds like uncle Bob". Then it dawned on me. It was uncle Bob. Only guy I ever knew who sang at his own funeral.

 

Oh god, I was kidding. I thought you were too, that is terrifying.

[Dbqgolfer]

One story that was told to me by pastor on the way to a cemetery (I'm a funeral director) is that at the cemetery the American Legion was doing the Military Rites and when they fired the rifles, the elderly widow got startled and fell out of her chair. Their 5 year old grandson then yelled "son of a bitch, they shot grandma!"

[huKSer]

At my grandmother's pre-funeral meeting with our pastor he came up to my aunt and said "So this must be grandma" He had middle stage Alzheimers. At the funeral after he finished the eulogy he had a long pause. I said to myself "Oh my goodness, he's going to start over"

[Mavric]

At the family service for one of my grandfathers, I was in charge of starting some of the music. Mid-song my then two year old daughter walked over to me and as I picked her up I bumped the remote I still had in my hand. Suddenly we were all listening to ABC by the Jackson Five.