This is funny!
BUT...if you have your house paid off before you retire, or hopefully well before that, and you have any type of savings at all and assuming soc-sec is around, which it should be, you will be fine.
My retirement, if I ever retire, will be naps, gym, golf, lunch with friends, drinks, naps, golf and sleeping.
Doesn't take much for those hobbies. Plus, I can substitute teach and by then...it will be 400 dollars a day.